Hayli Hooper: Nursing, Egg Freezing and Dating at 40

This transcript was generated automatically and lightly edited for readability. It may contain minor errors.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, So I love it. So that will phase out. Then I'll move on to just doing the OnlyFans because that makes such crazy money if you really commit to it. But you can't be successful at OnlyFans unless you have a huge social media platform. These days, dating is like an interrogation nearly immediately. I used to be so guilty of it and I'd be like, what do you do? How do you do it? Where do you want to go? Do you want kids? And then I was like, we've just taken the joy. I think we can get a little too rushed and too serious. So when the AI cameras came out. So right before I left for America, I got $2,200 worth of fines.

Paul Cohalan: Basically got Hayli Hooper here. Know each other on socials, but got a heap of close circles, I would say. Haven't really met before properly.

Hayli Hooper: No. But Perth is always six degrees of separation, isn't it?

Paul Cohalan: Something like that, I think. And. And they're usually the best ones because I don't know any of them. We just kick off and then all the questions come, all the surprise. Yeah, all the surprise. But she's a hoot anyway. She done it before and no doubt we'll have some laughs and looking forward to getting into it. So where I reckon we start is what I did say the other night, you won an awards. Tell us about the awards.

Hayli Hooper: Did. It's my final awards. So I have been. I've always had multiple jobs, but I've been in the adult industry for 23 years now. That's evolved from waitressing to skimpy work in the rural towns, to dancing overseas, to doing full on shows and to strip clubs. And I won the industry champion, which is a top award. So it's perfect to end your career at that point. That means you're recognized by the peers and the public at being, you know, the overall best entertainer and performer and that you've contributed to the industry in a positive way and being an advocate for the rights.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: And then I also.

Paul Cohalan: Did you. Did you prep that. That whole paragraph there? Did you sit in the room? Awesome.

Hayli Hooper: And I also won Best Hits, but I've won that three times.

Paul Cohalan: So that was like. Yeah, I've done it before.

Hayli Hooper: Well, I mean, you can't be mad at it, but yeah, the one I wanted was the top one. Got it. Boom, I'm done.

Paul Cohalan: Nice, nice. All right. So how old are you?

Hayli Hooper: 40.

Paul Cohalan: Are you 40?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, I turned 40 in June.

Paul Cohalan: Nice. Yeah, I'm 43. I love 40s.

Hayli Hooper: Do you know What? Well, I was so. I love the 30s. Everyone's like, oh, we're getting on, you know, your 20s, you're dumb, you don't have money.

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: You're still figuring shit out. You're having heaps of fun. 30s, you're finally getting there. You're getting to not give a shit anymore and you're getting to know yourself. And now like that mid-30s onwards has been amazing. I am a little hesitant about 40s. I think it's different for men and women though. Like at 40s we've got a lot more things on our brain. Like, you know, there's perimenopause, there's frigging kids, there's like all that sort of shit. Men are just like, whatever, I can do whatever I want for as long as I want.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, maybe I'll probably. I was chatting to someone about that. I'm like, I think it's a bit easier or better for us as we get older.

Hayli Hooper: For men?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, absolutely. There's no contest.

Paul Cohalan: I'm saying it's worse for women, but I, I think it's good. Yeah, I enjoy it.

Hayli Hooper: Men can still wash their face with soap and don't put conditioner in and don't age. You know, women get to 40 and it's all about the upkeep.

Paul Cohalan: Well, as I was just talking about getting old, I've never had to get glasses and this is the first time I wore them just now I just took them out of the box. I've got to get used to them. I can't change them whether I like them or not.

Hayli Hooper: Have you, have you graduated to like. I mean, did they start you off on bifocals or you just got one problem?

Paul Cohalan: No, these are the multifocals.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, you went straight into the deep old man territory.

Paul Cohalan: So there and there or whatever you do.

Hayli Hooper: Yep.

Paul Cohalan: No, I just went straight in. And I think outside that you go over color or whatever.

Hayli Hooper: No, it depends.

Paul Cohalan: What's it called?

Hayli Hooper: If you've only got one issue, then you just have the one lens where it will like, it might just be a magnifying perspective, but if it's multifocal then you could be short sighted and long sighted and have a combination.

Paul Cohalan: Now the color goes for the sun. What are they called? Yeah, so that they'll actually go over dark.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, they change. Oh, that's quite trendy.

Paul Cohalan: That's what I'm told. They showed me in the shop.

Hayli Hooper: Man, I've got the ones that don't even have any glare. They just get Your fingerprints all over.

Paul Cohalan: How long are glass for?

Hayli Hooper: So when I was nine, I had nerve damage in my eye. And the famous Fred Hollows is the surgery, the African surgery.

Paul Cohalan: You did a post about this the other day. Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: So he took my eyeball out and played with the nerves and stuff. And his surgery was so good. I was meant to get another one in my teens. Never did. Then he died. So that maybe 10 years ago. So it lasted 20 something years. They've just started to die. So my muscle is weak so it gets a bit lazy. I get a little bit of a lazy eye which is quite embarrassing. And then I also have the long sighted and short sighted thing. So I've had glasses on and off for 10 years and only really worn them two. That's probably the problem.

Paul Cohalan: So what now with them? Cause you did say something.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. So I find at night my eyes get tired or under like lack of sleep or high stress. The weakest muscle in your body is your eyes. So they are the first to go. Or if I party, if I have a few drinks and a bit of this and that, I am going cross eyed.

Paul Cohalan: Pretty quick party trick.

Hayli Hooper: No refunds on the stables river. Yeah, yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Okay, cool. Talking about sleep. No sleep. You're traveling at the moment. What's going on?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, I don't have any consistency in life, which is what I like. I like everything is a different day. And so for example, last night I finished work at like 1:32am I had commitments. I was training with someone who could only do it 5am so I had to be at the gym then. And then I have this today plus a whole list of to DOS before I fly out in 48 hours. So life is busy. But I like it. The problem is when I was doing nursing or when I am doing nursing and then this kind of work as well. There is no consistency in hours that I work.

Paul Cohalan: They don't flow.

Hayli Hooper: No, they don't flow. So I got insomnia for quite some time and I've somewhat starting to come out of that. So I'm just running on pure adrenaline and energy.

Paul Cohalan: Nice. I love it. And you love what you do, so that's a big help.

Hayli Hooper: I do.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: I also have unrelenting ADHD so that helps as well.

Paul Cohalan: I think every person that sits in that seat.

Hayli Hooper: Do you know what?

Paul Cohalan: We have this combo. It makes so much.

Hayli Hooper: It makes me so cringe when I'm like, it's the fucking key thing these days for everyone.

Paul Cohalan: I just call it superpower.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. But it is. So you lean into it and your productivity is tenfold of a normal person.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. And there's. Obviously there's. Where there's positives and negatives, but I think it outweighs. I'm like, I love it. Quick decisions, make decisions. Yeah. You might fuck up or whatever, but pivot, whatever.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. I think it makes you more adaptable. It makes you more tenacious.

Paul Cohalan: Better people skills.

Hayli Hooper: Better people skills. And I also think the productivity is just next level. You gotta be careful of your central nervous system and burning out and being a little too much for people, but fuck them.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, yeah. I'm glad we're on the same page. I actually think self reflect about this a lot and I talk about it a bit, but I'm like, in the end, I'm like, I'm not changing me.

Hayli Hooper: No.

Paul Cohalan: Got me where I am. I am where I am. If I change it or try to, like, be more conscious about it's for myself.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, Yeah. I. I distinctly remember a date I went on probably a year ago, and it was, I think maybe the second date. The first date was just a really short one. So we're sitting at dinner and I'm just being me, doing this. And then he looks at me and he says, are you on drugs? And I was like, what? No, this is just me. Like, I just talk quickly, loudly, and.

Paul Cohalan: I'm high on life.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. Like out. But so you get misunderstood is my point. And it made me like, if. If I was, say, for example, that person to be with him, I would have tone myself down or I'd have to. And you never want to be like that. I don't make excuses for it anymore. It's just, you know, at least I'm not boring. We're not boring.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, exactly. Actually, let's go back a step. Let's go back. Tell me a bit more about you. So you just ended the industry fully. What's that mean for you? Like you're not doing nothing at all?

Hayli Hooper: No, no. So it goes in phases. So I. I started working when I was 12 years old and nine months. So I've always had multiple jobs. I was at Hungry Jack's back then.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: Anyway, I've always had three to four jobs at a time, and particularly during COVID and I was studying nursing, and then I've been a nurse six years. I was juggling the adult industry. So by adult industry, what I mean is party hostessing. So on bachelor parties, boat trips, they get topless and nude waitresses, they're not hookers. You can't touch them. You can't f. There is bikini barmaids in rural towns, so we call that doing a regional run. About five years ago, I started OnlyFans. Again, not doing porn, just do nudes.

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: So the whole. It's just an evolution of that industry. So I've always had those three consistent consecutive jobs, plus then nursing. And I have a couple properties that are like Airbnbs that I manage that are mine. When I say getting out of the industry, I just realized that I'm at 40, not that it's an age thing. Like I am honestly making more money in the adult world than I ever did, but it's. I can't keep doing my fingers in so many pies because I'm not doing them 100%. So the best ROI for me is actually the online work. So I need to scale down the in person work. I finished my rural runs of pubs and then in the last summer, this coming summer will be my last summer waitressing, doing the party hostessing. Because that is the busy period and.

Paul Cohalan: Then that's what takes the time.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. And like you can do 40 hours a week with that alone. But then the next one. So it'll be pubs finish within six months, the waitressing finishes and then the overseas dancing will finish next year as well.

Paul Cohalan: Talk about that.

Hayli Hooper: So when you win awards, you can travel with them. So I've won Best Show, Best Female Performer and a whole bunch of other ones. My girlfriend, Delilah Daniels is Miss Nude Australia, Miss World leader of this exhibition. So we traveled to New Zealand together. We've done other the ones overseas. Canada. I've worked in Jakarta. I've worked in quite a few different countries. Can't say them all because they're all under the table a bit. But yeah, you can travel with them. And so it's just a way for me to combine my two loves is travel, paid holiday and make money.

Paul Cohalan: Awesome.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And you love it.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, so I love it. So that will phase out. Then I'll move on to just doing the OnlyFans because that makes such crazy money if you really commit to it. But social media is the biggest leader in that you can't be successful at OnlyFans unless you have a huge social media platform. And then when you're talking about social media, talking about running two to five Instagram accounts, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, shorts for YouTube. So the amount of content you need to put out per day of different reels and different apps four times a day is crazy. Crazy.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. And we Just spoke about this before, like, just start. And it might not be perfect, but you just, like, you just put it in. Even yesterday. I had a meeting yesterday and a day before, like, about our reels and how many and when they go out and then like the thumbnail. And then we're starting to get into that.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: If I worried about that before, I would have never started. I took long enough as a.

Hayli Hooper: And it's crazy because, like, so technically the thing is, depending on which app you're talking about. But yeah, you know, I'm pumping out four a day. They no longer. The algorithm's constantly changing. It used to be about timing, now it's just about consistency. Then half of my following is American, half Australian, so they're in polar opposite time zones. So to hit those markets are hard, so there's a whole science behind it. And then on top of that, so I've still got like the properties running, so I just couldn't. And nursing, which now has really taken a step back, so I just couldn't do it all.

Paul Cohalan: Who looks after the properties for you?

Hayli Hooper: I've got managers, but. Well, so I got two properties. One's full Airbnb, so I have a manager for that. The other one is a long term rental that I directly manage privately to no real estate. And then I've just been approved for a third and I will put that with the same management.

Paul Cohalan: Nice.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. Cool, Cool. So that just runs in the background.

Paul Cohalan: Someone told me that I know the person that might look after one of yours.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, really?

Paul Cohalan: Is it Tony?

Hayli Hooper: No, it's a killer.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: Chloe.

Paul Cohalan: Oh, no. Why did they say? Maybe they wanted to use it or something? I can't remember.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, no, I've got. She's amazing, honestly, she's. And that's again, that was a learning lesson, like a learning curve. If you don't reply to people in an hour, your rating goes down.

Paul Cohalan: Is that right?

Hayli Hooper: People are finicky about the dumbest things. Like my saucepan was burnt from the bottom. I was like, well, I can't help that some other cunt couldn't cook. How's that my fault?

Paul Cohalan: Do you want me to give you his number?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, yeah. Do you want. You know. Jesus. All right. It's not five star Ritz, my friend.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. So you only look after one. So that. Will you try to.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, well, times every day it's hard because I have had that for seven years or so. And my tenant. Oh, God, I hope he's not listening to this, but probably isn't. But it's a nightmare this time. So he was. He's been up to $10,000 behind a rent this year in different periods. And because I have to manage it to be fair, if you go through real estate, there's nothing they do different than what you can legally do yourself. But it's been stressful. When I was in America on the poll of the time zone, trying to get something, because I spent three months a year in America, and that was when he was up. And he's got legalities in his situation that I had to deal with. And so it's just an stress I don't need.

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. So I'll probably palm that off to a manager. Delegation is key. The better you get. Like, I have people that do help me with my social media now. They come up with ideas for me to recreate and marketing ideas. So you just can't have your time everywhere. I try and get good management in each sector of my incomes and then try and keep the.

Paul Cohalan: It's all about people.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. I've got about 15, 10 in the Philippines, and I've got five or so in Australia. And that's not including the editing team. That's all the insurance. And.

Hayli Hooper: Well, the editing is a. It's half the effort. I sometimes sit on my phone. I hate my phone now. And you look at it, and I've got reels from, like, six months ago that I'm like, oh, fuck, I still got to edit that one. Like, and then you got to learn, like, TikTok. I'm. I'm a millennial, not a Gen Z. I don't know what all the things are now.

Paul Cohalan: Oh, I can't keep up with it.

Hayli Hooper: They need to go on the bin. That one. That last one.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, I think so, too. Yeah. So I. I just load it and then send it. But it's a process, so less touch. Because it's all time. Right. Time's money, my time, their time. So the more I nail the process, they know what they're gonna put out every time they're doing four here. I'm up to. I launched 17 yesterday. Wes Capper, 17. Sorry, was not Episode 17 yesterday, was it? Wes. Yeah, it was. Wes Capper?

Hayli Hooper: Who's that?

Paul Cohalan: He owns a barn in Balcatta. Martial arts.

Hayli Hooper: He owns a barn.

Paul Cohalan: Like, it's called The Barn. Oh, martial arts, boxing, whatever. Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: How do you find your people? Just random.

Paul Cohalan: Most of it's relationships. I've got, like, I always say, I've got a list of about 230 on there that I just randomly went off. But then like, you know, you went on there. We didn't know each other, but it was like always like, pull these people in. And I've done. You're probably 23 now.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, wow.

Paul Cohalan: So I've got five sitting there that.

Hayli Hooper: Have got to go out one a week because it's interesting. Like I've done. Two were nursing ones. Two were like random. Just the stripper nurse. Like comparison. Like funny ones.

Paul Cohalan: Oh yeah.

Hayli Hooper: But yeah, it's interesting people's. And one was a full industry one. But it was. It's interesting people's podcasts. Like, I like the range. We get diversity. That's a similar to Diary of a CEO sort of vibe.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. He still talks about topics though.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, does he?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, Like I watch that heaps and subscribe to it and all that. Have for years. It does an amazing job. And I, you know, I always like.

Hayli Hooper: He started young as well.

Paul Cohalan: Any idea. His upbringing was pretty challenging, right?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: With me like this, I never know what I'm gonna get. And even people I know, I'm like, I didn't know that. Like, I just had Leo in last week with the shoes, Life of Viral and two hours in, and then he tells me he's colorblind. Like how the do you design and create shoes?

Hayli Hooper: Oh, really?

Paul Cohalan: All these shoes up here. And he's. He's teaching me all this stuff about them, like the colors and the. It's called the last. The silhouette of it. You do that first. Like he designs them from scratch by hand. He knows the millimeters, everything. Right. And all these shoes, I bought the whole set. Right.

Hayli Hooper: I'm like, viral.

Paul Cohalan: Life of Viral. Yeah. And then he goes, oh, yeah, and I'm colorblind. I only worked it out when I was 31 or something like that. And I'm like, it's just cool.

Hayli Hooper: Like, yeah, interesting.

Paul Cohalan: And obviously that was a challenge for him.

Hayli Hooper: Right.

Paul Cohalan: So risk, roadblocks and resilience. Right. And we don't realize.

Hayli Hooper: You know what I learned about Colorblind last night, ironically, at a job I was doing. So funny, I got paid last night. Fuck. Guys spend money on dumb things. But lovely dudes. So two girls, two guys. The guys were 26 and 30. And we got paid three hours nude to play Uno, Jenga and what was the other game? Monopoly card. Anyway, during Uno, their cards now, so you got the four different colors have little symbols in the top, like triangles, squares and things.

Paul Cohalan: What for Colorblind?

Hayli Hooper: For colorblind.

Paul Cohalan: Funny, I brought that up Oh, I.

Hayli Hooper: Was like, what's these symbols mean? It's like if you colorblind and you don't know what a color is, you look at the symbol. How cool is that?

Paul Cohalan: That's cool. I didn't know that you taught me something. So. So let's go back a step. Where were you born?

Hayli Hooper: Born in Sydney, so my family's from South Africa. They came over. I was born six months later in Sydney. Grew up all over the East Coast. Very gypsy lifestyle. We moved every two years.

Paul Cohalan: Where'd you start? East coast. Oh, no, east coast. I'm from Victoria actually.

Hayli Hooper: So Bondi, Coogee, Sydney up to then near Byron Bay, an area called Lismore.

Paul Cohalan: I know Lismore well, my uncle lives there.

Hayli Hooper: Shitty little town.

Paul Cohalan: But anyway, so were next to Nimbin as well. Yeah, yeah.

Hayli Hooper: So the Nimbin. So. But just out of Lismore, I'm even more rural than that. There's Lismore and Casino and in between that is these giant hills and is a place called Bentley and Clover. So that's where I grew up in the country. So it was like 10 years city, 10 years country. Moved out of home very young at 15, up to the Gold Coast. And then since then it's been nothing but moving and traveling.

Paul Cohalan: When you left home at 15 and went at the Gold Coast, what'd you do? It would have been pretty daunting. There you jumped.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. My parents never really let me forget that because there was no reason. I had a great family. I just was. Had this thirst for independence and wanted to get out. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: So it was you?

Hayli Hooper: Oh, there was absolutely no reason for me to go. And so I was a year 11, I think, and to move from New South Wales to Queensland, the curriculums didn't match up, so I had to go to a TAFE to finish Year 12, which meant I could live at a college campus. So I was like 15, 16 with these 18 year olds. I went to school two days a week, worked in nightclubs at night and then would go to school during the week. And my teachers felt sorry for me so they gave me A's and I.

Paul Cohalan: Just got no way.

Hayli Hooper: One of the classes.

Paul Cohalan: You talked them into it.

Hayli Hooper: One of the classes was marine studies and I specifically chose that so I could just spend the day on a boat once a week and I would literally work in Queensland. You could work in nightclubs when you're 17. You could only just turn up like 10 minutes before your shift and you had to go 10 minutes after. But you could still Work. So I'd be working like 5am then go to school and. Yeah, I just always had that drive to be out there until you're really independent.

Paul Cohalan: Aren't you stupid?

Hayli Hooper: My prized possession in life is freedom.

Paul Cohalan: So how the fuck do you go on dates or partners? Because you'd be like, I feel sorry for them.

Hayli Hooper: Well, I mean I was in relationships from 16 to 32. I did an eight year and then three years back to back and stuff. So I've really been single eight years since then. And I do find now that I have, you know, money behind me, I have education, I have freedom, very independent. That, that is very intimidating for men.

Paul Cohalan: There's one.

Hayli Hooper: My belief is though, if I meet someone, I would adapt. It doesn't change. I'm never going to do the nine to five white picket fence thing of course, but you make it work and I don't. I'm open to meeting someone from anywhere.

Paul Cohalan: In the world because I heard it was a farmer or country. I seen your post the other day.

Hayli Hooper: What is it?

Paul Cohalan: I seen your post the other day. Didn't you say something about a country lad or a farmer?

Hayli Hooper: Oh, a farmer. No, I just like in. Maybe it's through the waitressing work, but we get clientele from rough and ready tradies to billionaires. Right? And it's the billionaires, the millionaires, the real white collar are just so pretentious and wanky to me that I would take a down to earth country guy over that.

Paul Cohalan: That's what you're saying?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh no, I'm single Pringle still. Yeah, not surprisingly. At least I'm consistent. Yeah, that's true.

Paul Cohalan: Eight years now it is.

Hayli Hooper: But I'm having fun.

Paul Cohalan: So Gold Coast. So you were 15, done school, done what you could and then out of that, what, three years later.

Hayli Hooper: So unfortunately my life derailed for a bit and I met a guy at 16 and you know what, this is a weird thing. I actually never thought about this till the other day not long ago. But he was 24 and I was 16 and it never click was. It never was. Like why did no one bring that up? Like I didn't even realize it and it was never.

Paul Cohalan: You probably wouldn't listen.

Hayli Hooper: No one definitely wouldn't have listened.

Paul Cohalan: And you're probably pretty independent and mature for your own age.

Hayli Hooper: And he was really hot, but he was an absolute toxic. He derailed my life for eight years because I was so young and so naive and had such a clean slate that I had no thing to Compare it to. And he was a raging drug addict and orphan and like just. It was just one of those things. And I was stuck. I was up there for eight years but I was still in this industry. I was traveling around but I didn't like I was never out of the country or anything like that. So after that broke up three weeks later I met someone else and again went straight into another one. So the first time I was ever Punishment. Yeah. Oh my God. So the first time I was ever single was 27. And that's when I actually started traveling the world and going out and freedom. I got a bit of a break. I couldn't even tell you that year of my life. It was just a.

Paul Cohalan: Was it really? But yeah, but a good time.

Hayli Hooper: It was. Came back, didn't learn my lesson, got into another one. Probably the worst of all of them. And then that brings us to 32.

Paul Cohalan: Wow.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Fast forward. So go back to that eight year relationship when you were young and you. And I'll say dumb.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And I mean that nicely.

Hayli Hooper: Oh well, absolutely.

Paul Cohalan: But you're young, you're naive, you don't know.

Hayli Hooper: Right.

Paul Cohalan: What'd you get out of it? Like it was a long time. You're probably a bit spewing but you must have learned a lot. Now like you don't. It's probably part of the reason you independent don't put up with.

Hayli Hooper: Well it. Yeah, look, that was. Was DV. That was drugs. That was like I left because I was going to die. It was the. The downside of that. But a lesson that was important was what not to accept. I had to learn that self respect three times. So.

Paul Cohalan: Well, did you get better every time? Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: So there was three boyfriends. The first and the last were the same. The middle one was just a sad situation. He was an ex army vet and he just had his own army problems. Ironically, all my boyfriends have been orphans or. Which is the weirdest correlation or. No, no parents in their life. They've all been addicts in one form or another and they've all had no jobs and they've all been broken and bent and I was this person that came in to save them.

Paul Cohalan: Which.

Hayli Hooper: Where does that come from? I don't know why. Like I was so independent and it was the last one I realized I was sacrificing. I'll never forget a drive down to Margaret River as I've met the guy a few months in and he's telling me, oh, there'll always be other women but you'll be number one. And I was listening to it going, okay. And then I was like, hang on, what are you agreeing to? Like, what's happened to you that your self esteem has gotten so low that this person you've just met, that you're in a relationship now with is telling you that you will never. That he's always going to cheat on you and he's always going to, but it's okay because he likes you the most. And you're sitting there nodding your head like what is broken inside of you? So it took a long time. So when I finish that relationship, that's all those lessons have accumulated to self worth, resilience, independence, not being at the mercy of someone, but to the point where it got a little detrimental that I had my walls up too high.

Paul Cohalan: And now that happens a lot.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. And now I'm learning the vulnerability again.

Paul Cohalan: Does it, does it make you not give a fuck about doing content? Is that, is that like all that stuff? Like you wouldn't care much about what people think? I've been through it.

Hayli Hooper: I. Yeah, no, honestly, I. I used to care and go, oh, I didn't get many likes or oh, that's embarrassing. And then, you know, one day a couple years ago, I was like, you know what? I don't give a shit. 90% of the people that like my stuff are not my friends anyway. It's random. My friends are so busy with their own lives, they're not watching. And if they are, they're either a true friend and support or they don't give a shit. Whatever. Either way, like, give it a go. And I ended up meeting people in America that I've seen have such an amazing result from social media. Like I'm talking crazy money. And it just motivated me to go, I'm not getting any younger. What are you waiting for? Start doing it. Balls to the wall. Doesn't matter if it gets 50 likes or 500,000, whatever.

Paul Cohalan: No. And it's not followers these days anyway. Follow Gary Vee, if you don't already.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, no, I do have Gary Vee.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, I've met him twice. Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: Did you?

Paul Cohalan: I've followed him for years.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. Have you heard him speak?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, he does, yeah. Yeah. I went to two of his keynotes.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, wow.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. Once with my ex wife and I think once with a mate. Yeah. And when I went with my ex wife, we done the VIP thing and met him, shook his hand, got a photo and all that.

Hayli Hooper: Yes.

Paul Cohalan: I've followed him for years, he's absolute legend.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And he's just like this.

Hayli Hooper: Do you know what? It's funny with social media, it's. You can construct all the concepts or recreate the virality of whatever goes on, but it's the off the cuff whim ones that I've done that kill it.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: And the hard part is they don't come every day, but when they do, they I just know that something could. But it also shows you to stop overthinking it as well.

Paul Cohalan: Just do it.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Because no one's going to critique it like you do. But if you sit there and look at it and rewatch it and yeah, you always give it a quick look. I'm like that, right? I'm like, don't pick it up, Paul.

Hayli Hooper: Just put it up. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And like, this is all planned. Not planned. This is on the, you know, off the cuff. But the editing, you know, it's all planned schedule.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: But lately. And I'm like, fuck. There's so many, like, quotes, comments, conversations that I have. And I'm like, I don't need to just do the podcast because it's about what it's about. And I'm like, I've started, like, getting on and shouting out, who's coming up? And all that. And that's been getting like. Because that's me come back from boxing in the morning in the back of a car. And like. And just random, you know, and it's really good. Really good. And they're the bits, they're really authentic.

Hayli Hooper: Because people want to see something that's real. They don't want, like, it's even funny for girls. They don't want to see the five filters. They want to see something natural. They want to see some imperfections. They want to hear you stumble. Oh, like. Or, you know, it doesn't have to be perfect. A1 smooth. Like, people want something that's real. And the other thing I'll say is embrace the negativity because, oh, my God, I had a couple of things go viral in a bad way. But I was laughing about it because I was like, actually driving my algorithm even higher.

Paul Cohalan: Thank you very much for watching.

Hayli Hooper: You're coming across. And one thing, I did this stupid video on Crocs. I hate Crocs. I'll burn them anyway.

Paul Cohalan: I would have worn mine today.

Hayli Hooper: I will burn them anyway. Some famous American guy reshared it like three times to like 6 million people for six months. I had the Croc army come after me. And I'm not even kidding you, I had messages, people going, I hope your close family members die, like. Like over a shoe video.

Paul Cohalan: But what'd you say? What'd you do?

Hayli Hooper: It was a picture, a video in central Queensland of this couple. And I, like, for two seconds, I, like, immediately zoomed in on their feet, but for the slightest second, you see the side of their faces. You never saw who they were. You couldn't identify them, but that was what they picked up on anyway. And I zoom in on their shoes, and they were playing footsies with each other in matching Crocs on holidays. And I made a joke saying, may this love never find me, because I would never. What I meant is, I would never go out in public in Crocs on holidays. You know, it had nothing about them. And people like, oh, you've publicly shamed a couple in love and posted their face everywhere. Anyway, long story short, but the followers I got from onto my OnlyFans from that.

Paul Cohalan: Thank you very much.

Hayli Hooper: You might hate my opinion of shoes, but you made me money. Like, so impressed. And people are like, oh, are you okay? I see your Instagram's getting slaughtered. I was like, I don't give a shit. Like, they're Pete Randoms. Who cares what they think?

Paul Cohalan: I. Some had words in a message probably a month ago and with an old ex best mate, and we. I just said, don't talk to me, basically. And he's in a bit of a hole. I feel sorry for him. But then at the end of the message, like, I wouldn't even listen to your podcast anyway with your three followers. And I'm like, so you're watching it.

Hayli Hooper: Thanks, mate. Cause, you know, there's three, so now there's four.

Paul Cohalan: I'm like, and I give a fuck.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. And everyone starts somewhere. And it's honestly consistency. You just. You just gotta keep posting to the algorithm to keep pushing you and it.

Paul Cohalan: Will grow and what helps. And I spoke to some young ones about this as well. I'm like, just start like speed trumps perfection, right? And I took three years to do it. And then when you get the little good nuggets, they outweigh the others. Like, I've. I've had two cold people reach out now by searching.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And they're like, I watched it. I want to tell my story. Like, you know, some's, you know, nearly died, some's this, some's that. But just their book, their chapters. Right?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And that's amazing feeling.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And then last Friday, and this was one of the just natural reel, I put up one of the guests got a phone call and he hadn't spoke to this guy for three years, but he'd seen one of the reels and it was about separation, not seeing your kids. And he goes, man, you don't know. Ten days ago I stopped seeing my kids and just talking to you. Help me out. And like, if I don't get nothing for the rest of the. Yeah, fuck, that fills my cup.

Hayli Hooper: Isn't it crazy?

Paul Cohalan: Gives me chills thinking about it.

Hayli Hooper: It does. And it's the reach of social media is insane. Like the synchronicity of life where it's the most random conversations that, that really hit a note with someone. But with social media you could be hitting a note with someone in India or someone in wherever.

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: And people from your past. Yeah. The more I could started posting, the more I started not gonna lie. There was a couple weeks there were just random guys from my past just popped up again and I was like, I haven't spoken to you in like six years.

Paul Cohalan: What's going on with this algorithm?

Hayli Hooper: And they're all like, why are you all over my feed? I was like, go back to the bin.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, I, yeah, it's so good. And it does. And it brings up a lot of stuff you don't even realize. Like, and then people message you get a couple of mates and. But you don't give a fuck about them. But it's like the random messages I'm getting now or you know, from a mate in Sydney, he's like, man, keep doing what you do. Like I even do like the lift video in the morning and I, I was gonna stop it cause it felt a bit weird. But it's like my thing now. Late in the morning I'm like, bring on today. Like let's get in a lift in my apartment. And then I get people sending them back to me and stuff like that. And I'm like, cool community, right. It's all about, you know, if I can make a social impact. And I've got, you know a lot of people, like a lot of us do. And WA is pretty close anyway.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And it always helped me in business and when I started this, I never knew how much that was gonna help me because I reckon people struggle to get people on and they only do four or five podcasts and stop a lot of people. Right?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: So when I'd done 11, I had like a two month break, moved office or three months. And then I'm like, I'm doing a year one a week and I missed a week. So I've Done two the next week, so. And I've got four in the bank now.

Hayli Hooper: It's all having your bare minimum, your floor, and just being like, even on the worst days, I still wanna achieve this. But also, I think people, it's twofold. You're always gonna have your people that follow you to secretly hate you or jealous of you, but you're also going to have the people where they wish they had the balls to do it and they get motivated by it. And I remember I've had a number of messages similar to that, but also people, because I always show the good, the bad and ugly. A lot of people just show the good and they appreciate that being real. But even like my fertility journey, I froze my eggs, for example, And I spoke about that, about. Well, that happened five years ago and I think I did a follow up one or two years later. Six years on, I still get people, hey, I remember you posted something about that. How good can you tell me? And I've had over 10 girlfriends the same thing because they became aware of it. And the rebates and the procedures because of what I posted.

Paul Cohalan: Talk to me about it.

Hayli Hooper: So I got pregnant twice by accident when I was 31 and 32. First was a miscarriage. Second, I ended up getting injected with like vaccines. I was pregnant, really bad ones. And it got rid of it. Long story short, I thought I was always fertile. I was like, fuck, I got pregnant at 32, I must be fine. Break up at 32 from a long one. And then it got to about 34, 35. I was like, oh, maybe I'll just have a look and see what my fertility is like. Dropped off a cliff.

Paul Cohalan: You did.

Hayli Hooper: And it was a $70 blood test. It's called an AMH. And it's an indication which does fluctuate of your fertility levels. Now, when you're 40, you're also, say, approximately when you're menopausal or whatever, your score would be at zero. When you're 20, your score would be at about 40. And it's a sliding scale, right? So at 35, mine was down to a 2.1, which is abominable. Right? And so what I didn't realize at first, you get that number in your head and you feel so like the choice has been taken away from you. Turned out to be amazing because there's a rebate when your score is so low for your age, it becomes a medically required thing rather than elective thing. So this is back when it was $10,000 a pop. I got $18,000 of three fertility treatments and I only paid $1800. I did three rounds and I ended up getting 33 eggs, which is amazing result. And paid fuck all for it. And now that's been in a fertility clinic for six years now. So the option's always there. And the funny thing is that woke my body up and raised my natural fertility level.

Paul Cohalan: Did it really?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. So I mean it's. The more you know and the more you sock that away.

Paul Cohalan: Is there an expiry date on them?

Hayli Hooper: No. So the rules are weird though. So WA has the strictest rules regarding this and they are actually under review because they are outdated. So in WA they will only re implant them up to the age of 44. Whereas there is no reason your body can carry them at any age. Pretty much the menopause and all that,.

Paul Cohalan: You're up for it?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. So the menopause part really just affects your fertility. So if you've taken your fertility option out, you can still just chuck them in your body. So I could go overseas? I mean, if you wanted to. The other thing is sperm donating. This is a fascinating.

Paul Cohalan: Here we go. There's a shaky smile here.

Hayli Hooper: There is a black market of sperm donation, particularly in Perth. So is there in WA from what I understood from this is from testing my memory. But you get five options of fertility donors and there is an 18 month waiting list. And in that five options, if you say no to five, you don't get any more, but you don't get any photos of them. You get a 10 question thing which is fuck all. Maybe their ethnicity, maybe their education and their health. You know nothing about them. So I was like, who's gonna choose that for their kid when you don't even know what the person looks like? So there is one Facebook page of underground sperm donation where they're fathered like 3,000 babies. So gay couples, lesbian couples, single dads, single moms, all get on, make this real informal thing. Some of them come and jack off in a cup and then scoop it into the lesbian's pussy as she's in the room next door. Because there's AI and there's NI. So natural insemination and artificial insemination. So a lot of the lesbians actually choose to fuck the random guy because it has a high chance of it taking. And there's this whole thing. But then also I was, I remember getting home from a party one day at like 3am and jumping online and listening to voice notes of sperm donors in Sweden. And it was the most random thing there. You pay a thousand dollars to start a profile. You get their pictures, and then the sperm is only like about a thousand euros, so it's pretty cheap. And then they cryo-freeze it and send it over. But listening to the voice notes of what these people or why these people chose to donate, you're either getting the egotistical, you know, God that wants their seed out there everywhere, or you get the people that like, help. But it was such a journey. I ended up getting a good friend who was a male model who's really attractive. I was like, how about I buy your sperm and I freeze it with mine separately? So again, new law in WA. Or interesting law. I paid $470 for him to go to a fertility clinic and jack off. And then they freeze it and then they send us the consent letters and they're like, right, do you want to have your consultant? I was like, what do you mean? And he goes, well, you have to have a psychiatric appointment. Then we implant it. I was like, no, I don't want to use it. I want to just freeze it and have it next to mine and in five years time we can do this. And they go, you can't own his sperm. I was like, what do you mean? You want him to donate sperm and you loan. And there is a law that clinics can own someone's sperm. But unless I intend to use your sperm right now, I can't own it. So in five years time, if I wanted to use his sperm, if he had a new partner, she has to come to the meeting and has to be a whole three way. Then there's a three month cooling off period.

Paul Cohalan: They make it impossible still.

Hayli Hooper: Oh yeah. Should have just fucked, right? Yeah, yeah. So anyway, learn a lot.

Paul Cohalan: Wow. You've just told me something.

Hayli Hooper: So I just have eggs and. Yeah. And whatever happens. But I'm not really that fussed.

Paul Cohalan: Well, I mean, don't I got a snip.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, did you?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. Back in back. Yeah, I got two. 11 and 13.

Hayli Hooper: Oh yeah?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. Daughter just turned 13.

Hayli Hooper: That's cute. You're gonna have a fun phase there.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, yeah. She's amazing. I get them every second week and it was really cool actually. She was at mine for her birthday, so we got the pink Hummer down to.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, that's cool.

Paul Cohalan: The limo, she didn't know either. She thought she was just getting the party bus. We got that on the way home.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And I'll. I book it and Nat books it, my EA. And I'm like, it's got stripper poles in that. My daughter's not going in there. Nat's like, I thought the same thing. Now I traveled with him right on the way home. Do you know what? Even my boy, they had best fun.

Hayli Hooper: Do you know what?

Paul Cohalan: But it's my.

Hayli Hooper: It's your conversation.

Paul Cohalan: He's not fucking going in that bus.

Hayli Hooper: Do you know why? It's funny. There was a video about COVID times and it's like you don't know what's going on in people's homes. And people with poles had set up gymnastic mats around and young boys, because pole is actually very like fit, orientated and very hard. And these two young boys are like swinging. But it's fun for them. It's a playground to them. It's not sexual. No, it's the adults.

Paul Cohalan: They had so much fun. So she thought she had the party bus and then I worked out the numbers because you can only have up to 16 and not everyone was going down with her to go to Flip Out and Bibra Lake because I had netball, I thought it was 10. A few more rock ups. So it was maxed out at like 16. So it was perfect. And my boy got in as well. And they had so much fun in the Hummer. It rocked up and I got a glass foyer so it rocked up out the front. And all the girls are waiting. Yeah, all year sevens.

Hayli Hooper: That's cute.

Paul Cohalan: All the mums come and they're like. I'm like, yeah, someone will help. Nah, nimble, I'm out. So we got in that went to.

Hayli Hooper: Flip Out you and 16 kids.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. And my driver at the moment he gave me was with me for the day because if I needed to do anything, balloons and whatever and then Flip Out and then went to Raw. So it's a big playground down there. I've never been there.

Hayli Hooper: These are bouncy things. Things.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, it's got everything. It's huge. Yeah, they got MMA gyms, they got everything. They got this big restaurant as well. Anyway, I went there, just piled it all on and then got on the party bus, come home, they had a ball.

Hayli Hooper: That's how good. Yeah, yeah. 13th birthday parties. I mean, what are they on there? Fairy bread and candy or. No. Or is it like. Is it like a mini high tea?

Paul Cohalan: No, because went to that raw. So I just ordered heap of pizzas, chicken.

Hayli Hooper: It was perfect because 13 year olds these days, like TikTok has kind of ruined the younger generation. Like there's a lot of 13 year.

Paul Cohalan: Olds that trying to get a standard.

Hayli Hooper: Well, they look 16, 18. It was crazy. I was in Vietnam with my stepdad. We sit down at this show.

Paul Cohalan: I was going to ask you about that actually.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, Vietnam's crazy. But we're in this VIP area to watch the show and me and him are here and then this little girl, well, not little girl, she was quite tall but she was at least like maximum 11 or 12. Right. And her mum, I would say 40. Is that hot, by the way? But anyway, smoking hot. But the mum's on her phone constantly. The daughter has got her back to me on her phone so I can see her phone and she was just on non stop for two hours of the show watching tiktoks of herself and it was her in like this flowing dress, like pouting and doing all this in the tiktoks. And I'm like, you couldn't be more than 11 or 12. And it was just so ridiculously sexualized but in a way that obviously a child doesn't know even what they're doing. They just, they just see these trends and they're trying to like do it. And it made me so uncomfortable watching. I was like, when did you. When did they stop being kids?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, yeah. It's a hard one in it because of, you know, social media these days and all that. I think I'm pretty lucky. I've got two good kids. I'm probably a bit biased, but they are really good and I owe that to my ex wife a lot. She's done an amazing job with them as well, you know.

Hayli Hooper: And you guys are amicable, you're your ex wife.

Paul Cohalan: No, we don't really talk but she probably wouldn't give me the same credit. She's probably got resentment still, I think in saying that. I don't give a fuck. My opinion is she's a wicked woman. I'm lucky to have her as a mum of my kids and an ex wife.

Hayli Hooper: How good?

Paul Cohalan: And I don't regret it was a. We had, you know, wicked journey.

Hayli Hooper: How long were you together?

Paul Cohalan: 16 years.

Hayli Hooper: Oh wow, that's a good one.

Paul Cohalan: 12 years.

Hayli Hooper: 16 years.

Paul Cohalan: 16, Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: That's a big difference.

Paul Cohalan: 2008. Yeah, no, it's the glasses. Couldn't think. Nah, she's wicked and she's a wicked mom. And all that time lets everything go out, you know. I learn a lot from separating. Like hold a mirror up big time.

Hayli Hooper: And that's the biggest thing about relationships is the biggest red flag of someone is when they talk about their past relationship and they say, so villainize their ex or whatever, that's fine. Some of them are villains. But what did you do wrong? Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: None of us are perfect. Men are immature.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. And you have to learn what you did wrong and what you'll do better and what you wouldn't do again. That whole self.

Paul Cohalan: I'm gonna have an amazing relationship. But also what I have learned, and I had one relationship after for about four or five months, is I learned so much self respect. You talked about it earlier. Right. And even recently, like going on dates and stuff. And if it's just if they're not emotionally available or, you know, it just doesn't gel.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Nothing bad, but I'm just like, self respect.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And I wasn't like that a bit, but I can spend time on my own now and like, last two years. Don't need to work as you do.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: If you're gonna reflect, you've got to work on it. Not just reflect and say, hey, sorry. I just learned I probably wasn't mature enough in certain ways and I. It took that for me to shift.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Now I can't wait.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. I love being alone. Like, I mean, when you talk about, like, being at home, basically just being at home alone sort of thing, like, to be able to sit in your own presence and. And I travel on my own. I go to dinners on my own. I do that. But, like, yeah. That is again, for me a red flag if people can't be on their own.

Paul Cohalan: So. So it is a problem for a lot of us. But it's probably got me where I am as well. Like work, drive, all that. Right. It's all related. Right. I go down the rabbit hole with childhood trauma stuff and patterns and triggers. Not just trauma, but the whole bit. And I do heaps around it. And it's probably where this is going to evolve into. It's about identity change. Now when you get to this age, and probably the main reason I want to do this is about 35 on, everything starts to kick in because like you said, 20s, you don't give a fuck, you're out. You know, you're resilient, you can block whatever you want out. Family, you work hard, you play hard. And I was ex Navy, that's why I come here. So, like, pretty resilient. But then 35, whatever age, everyone's a bit different. You start having responsibilities, you've got kids. Like, everything starts coming up where you go through what you went through, you know, the fertility thing. But all that changes you. You become more mature. Emotions starting to come up. Right. You can't just keep pushing them down.

Hayli Hooper: No. And it's the same as, like, when you talk about childhood trauma. When you start to get older, you start to recognize who your parents or your family are, out of their roles as a parent. So what was their life before they had you, which then fundamentally became the way that they parented you? No, but this is what I mean. So now you realize, my dad did not love me. He just didn't know how to be a dad. There was no malice intended or whatever. He was just useless, to be honest. But his intention was there. And then. So then you start to let go of a little bit of that trauma because you realize the intention behind. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: You don't have to condone.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: But you forgive and you let go. And the moment you let go, you open up space for other shit in your world.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And you know. Yeah. I say the universe is a funny thing, but you don't learn this until you're meant to learn it either. Right.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And I actually chatted with a close mate, and I think you know him, but last night about this as well. We've been talking a bit, last couple of weeks about it, and I've been trying to say, like, all the work I've done, because most guys from a guy's point go through this at some point, whether you separate or stay together, you know? Cause we don't. We don't. We're not that good at relationships. You get together 20, 30, and you, she's hot or whatever. You got a kid or you're like, you don't. Like, now I have the chat.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: You know, what do you want out of life for the next. You know, you can have the hard chat because you're mature and you can sit there and have a normal conversation. You can't do 15 years.

Hayli Hooper: What do you recommend this with dating?

Paul Cohalan: Okay.

Hayli Hooper: So I've recently seen a few things. I think it was Jay Shetty that was saying it.

Paul Cohalan: And it's like, what you mean? Every day?

Hayli Hooper: The older we get, dating is accelerated, but also slightly in a negative way, because when you meet someone, you see red flags quicker. You get on the same page quicker. You have those chats quicker. But the. The downfall of that is like, these days, dating is like an interrogation. Nearly immediately, people have forgotten to have. Like, sometimes on the first date, you don't have the right. Like, I used to be so guilty of it. And I'd be like, what do you Do. How do you do it? Where do you want to go? Do you want kids? Blah, blah. And then I was like, you've just taken the joy out of actually naturally meeting someone and having that spark, that fun. I think we can get a little too rushed and too serious. So the last date I went on, which was actually like, for the stripper.

Paul Cohalan: Awards, he walked in and you're dancing on the table.

Hayli Hooper: No, I. I'm still. I think I've seen him three times. And I've never asked about your past relationship. Not that those don't matter. Like, that will. That conversation will come.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: But we've not once said, how long are you single? What is your past relationship? What do you want? It's just been. Want to go play golf? Want to go have some fun, Want to have a laugh. And it's been nothing but a good vibe. But that's what I mean is, like, it kind of highlighted to me. Me. No, you still need to have those chats.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: 100. But I'm sorry.

Paul Cohalan: Depends how good you read people. Because if there's no red flags, that's okay. Then, like, you're not talking about.

Hayli Hooper: No, no, no. Yeah, no, I'm talking like, though a couple, like, have. Have a week or two to have fun and then get in. And I'm not saying leave it like.

Paul Cohalan: Three months or something, but I think it comes back to gut feel when you meet them anyway, whether you have the convo or not. Yeah. You kind of know it. You've got to connect. Right.

Hayli Hooper: I know. I would say. I know within two dates, if it's. If there's nothing. Like, I've met so many guys that are so nice on paper and so absolutely nothing wrong with them. But then it's like, you just could be my mate. Like, there's no vibe.

Paul Cohalan: Eight billion people in the world, Right.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And. And the other piece to this dating thing is people are like, oh, it's out there. It's hard dating. I'm like a little bit of a numbers game, and I'm not a numbers person. It's like, you've got to connect and all that.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: But it is a numbers game. Like, you can't go one date and someone's a weirdo, or they you over ghost you and then you go dating as fuck. Like. Yeah, you don't. Especially coming out of relationship. You don't know what dating's like. I never had apps before, so it's like, horrible. You got to give it a go. You got to put effort in you.

Hayli Hooper: Do you have to put in effort. You can't take it personally. 99.9% of people not wanting you is nothing to do with you. It's them. But also people need to stop being cowards and ghost. I can't stand ghosting. If I went on three dates with you I would then and it wasn't vibing whatever. I would message you and go it's been lovely.

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: I, you know it's nothing.

Paul Cohalan: It's either there, it's not you, it's me.

Hayli Hooper: No, no. I would literally just say it's literally a connection that's naturally there or it's not.

Paul Cohalan: I don't feel it.

Hayli Hooper: How simple it is. You either feel it or you don't. I can't fault you. It's just not there. Every single time. The response has been positive. Thank you for letting me know. No problem whatsoever. But many times I've been stood up, ghosted, catfished, heaps.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, no, I won't do that. I, I, I try and be kind and respectful and like guys sometimes struggle and I'm like be kind.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Have a bit of respect. That's it. It's that simple. And you gotta have a bit of confidence too. Right. So.

Hayli Hooper: Well it's a perpetual circle of if you don't say anything, you're leaving that person in doubt which doubts their self worth which then makes them a bit more of a head case for the next one. And then it keeps going like just be nice and end their in their doubt.

Paul Cohalan: Yep. And if you don't know it just. But you gotta get, you gotta lean in like you said earlier about something else. You gotta lean into it, you know, give it a crack. What's the worst. No.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: It's like doing anything in life. You know and you go on a couple, you outta your comfort zone, you become okay.

Hayli Hooper: Have you. I mean it took me a while but I went through, I've gone through a couple periods in life where I just give up alcohol for ages and then get back on but dating first dates stone cold sober like out at night like fair enough. Walking and coffee is fine but like meeting for dinner and you get nerves and stuff. I found that a huge learner of how like it forced you to relax. It forced you to be present to.

Paul Cohalan: Not have a drink.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. To be to do to approach them sober because your go to cuz we when you meet someone is to have an icebreaker over a wine or you.

Paul Cohalan: Know it is that's the natural word for everyone.

Hayli Hooper: It's a placebo effect. Of I can relax and chill or a couple drinks and I'll be more confident. I found dating, being sober, going on first date sober really forced you to see how comfortable you actually are.

Paul Cohalan: That's the cracker. Do you know what? I do actually it's a bit similar. I don't talk to a lot of chicks off apps. I'm pretty confident. Just you meet somehow. Right. If you put out good energy and you're in a good spot, you usually end up connecting with someone. Pretty confident. Go, hey, do you want to chat whatnot when you chat at home for a couple of days. I'm really big on doing a video call. Right. Because it just cuts out the like.

Hayli Hooper: Because otherwise no one needs to see themselves in 4 hd at like 6 in the morning.

Paul Cohalan: I tell you. Well not 6 in the morning. It's probably at night time. The thing is it's like. And it doesn't always work. But I tell you what, it's worked more than none. And they're like, fuck. I don't normally. Even recently. I don't normally video. But we actually probably don't talk with it unless you're driving or something.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Without video on. And it's cool because you get the face to face in genuine. Because everyone does up. Everyone. I went and met a chick and she was with the kids at the shop and said. I'm like, I'd rather. And then she's like, oh, you see me the other day, my mummy clothes. I'm like, I would rather see that.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And then you go out. Everyone can dress up and go out for lunch.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. No, that's true. I don't know what it is about video calls but I've had quite a few guys ask me and I shut it down. I don't know what it is. I find it intrusive. Maybe it's because of my work. Because I've constantly got people online and trying to be in your face when I choose to not have someone come through. Yeah. I feel like you have to meet me and earn that. Whereas I just find it very confronting. I don't even video. I only recently started video calling my parents because now I want to like see them as they get older.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: But some. Something about video calls just was different thing.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: I'd give you a phone call. No problem.

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: And I would meet you in person. But I also like. Yeah. I don't know what I find confronting about them.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: Once I get to know someone.

Paul Cohalan: But even if they say no. Right. Say they're not Comfortable doing it. That's cool.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: But you can even tell by the response to that, it tells you a lot. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, it's like, hey, I don't normally do it. I'm a bit uncomfortable. But it'll be a normal chat. Yeah, it'd be cool, no problem.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: But like, do you get what I mean?

Hayli Hooper: You are still like, for example, say they're doing at home and you haven't yet met, then you are still technically having a stranger in your presence and in your home sort of thing. So. Yeah, I just know. That's so interesting.

Paul Cohalan: But when it does happen, especially people that don't do it, they're actually like most of the time it's been positive.

Hayli Hooper: Is it? Yeah, yeah. Okay.

Paul Cohalan: And then some just send messages instead of.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, okay.

Paul Cohalan: So, so there's that as well.

Hayli Hooper: That distinction is so odd because I would happily literally just do a video and go, hey, this is me. This is where I am.

Paul Cohalan: TikTok or Snap or something.

Hayli Hooper: I don't know why that is.

Paul Cohalan: This is funny.

Hayli Hooper: It is an interesting. It's a bit hypocritical, isn't it? I don't know.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. I'm. When you leave, I'm going to video call you in a couple hours.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, well, now that I've met you, it's fine. I'm talking about like the straight off the bat random. Also, it's the most inconvenient time. Like you'll be on the toilet or you'll be out or you'll be sweating. You're like, no, I don't want to video chat right now.

Paul Cohalan: So I probably wouldn't do it. If you've just got one message, just said, you know, you've probably chatted on for a few days. It's a bit of an icebreaker and it doesn't work for everyone. But I tell you what, it's been more positive and also you build a connection straight away.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And you know, like, if you, I,.

Hayli Hooper: I love to, on dates, go in a bit weird. I like to go.

Paul Cohalan: Tell us about that.

Hayli Hooper: Like just go in with like weird humor banter and just. See, it's like a sink or swim thing. Like, can you keep up? Can you laugh it off? Like so many people are so dry and boring.

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: And even if someone is quirky, even if it's not your vibe, appreciate the fact that they're being.

Paul Cohalan: We're not meant to be the same.

Hayli Hooper: That's what I mean. Yeah. So I don't really go in with small talk. I will. I had a period there, so. Okay. One negative side about being independent is I'm quite competitive and I have. I need to learn a bit more of my feminine energy because I definitely have always paid for myself, taken care of myself, all that stuff. So when I'm on dates, that can naturally come out a little bit too much. So I'm an activities person. So I would invite them to like mini golf or. Yeah, okay. But then I would talk them and like, be like, I'm gonna. I'm gonna sink you in this game. And so I just didn't know how to take it. But yeah, so I had to kind of learn. There is a balance between.

Paul Cohalan: Actually, they're trying to find them, they're trying to.

Hayli Hooper: They're trying to, like, be nice and sweet. So. Yeah. But it was interesting that you do evolve when you're dating.

Paul Cohalan: But you might. And. And I've had this chat recently, like, some women don't get the most moment with their exes and that to be that feminine side. But you might not shift till you get a guy that's an alpha.

Hayli Hooper: No, I. I have all part of it. That's what I mean is like, I definitely. I've done a lot of looking into this whole vulnerability thing. And you just. I just need someone. I don't want someone to. I don't want to emasculate someone, but I need someone that's more masculine so that I am automatically in my feminine. And I have had that once or twice, briefly. I've noticed it. I was like, oh, okay. I'm happy to let them take charge. Or they. I know that this person is capable of taking charge. Like, it's where I've. The ADHD thing fucks me up a bit because also with the traveling, for example, I meet someone and I go, hey, we have a great date or something. I'll be like, cool, let's do something in two days time. Because I'm only home for XYZ time. But the problem is I don't let them take the lead. But I also know that I'm time poor. They then think I'm too keen. Seen all that I've taken away and I'm like, no. And I'm just like, you don't get it. Like, don't misread this as me chasing you. This is me going, this is my two days. Make the most of it or miss out, because I guarantee you're going to message me in two weeks time and I'll Be gone for a month. But then they go, oh, well, it's too quick or it's too much or it's too. I was like, what do you want?

Paul Cohalan: Like, yeah, you got to deal with that because you've got to find that right person. Like, I, I love it when like, say on an app or whatnot, they're like, I, I need to find, you know, someone, can they keep up with me? I'm like, I think you might have met your match. Like, and I don't mean just in bed or whatever. I mean like just in, you know, their energy. Because we do need them. People to match. But also, like, my relationship I had, she was like the other way. Like, counterbalance. Yeah, yeah, counterbalance. So I'm trying to learn all that. Like, do you really want some? But I, I think I need someone. Cause I'm so go, go. I need someone a bit like that as well, I think. I don't know.

Hayli Hooper: Well, I mean, it's the thing I've always envisioned that maybe lifestyle more and you balance more, but then also you're gonna be too busy for each other or like, is it not gonna work? I don't know. It is a tough one. Do you know what's funny you say about that? When people say things on dating apps for me, as an avid traveler, which is like something I'll never stop when people are going, oh, I love coffees in airports and plane tickets. And I'm like, right, buy a ticket, let's go next week. And they go, oh, no, in eight months time, I've got a week off. Like, fuck off, my friend. That's just something else.

Paul Cohalan: So really, you do it when it's suits?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, like, that's not.

Paul Cohalan: There was something else. I was just going to say to you. There's two points and you brought up both of them. It'll come back to me.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, yeah.

Paul Cohalan: It's to do with the Alphabet, I think the alpha.

Hayli Hooper: Alpha.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: Well, look, I came from a very poor and broken home. Not it was bad home, but my parents split up after 6 months old. My mother was from a South African family that was like super wealthy, but when they came here super poor because the money got stuck there, blah, which led to them to have a culture shock and not deal with it. Well, anyway, for five years or so I lived on pancakes and rice in St. Vinnie's clothes. And that's where like my drive.

Paul Cohalan: Wow.

Hayli Hooper: Well, that's what I mean is like, my parents were so busy Keeping us afloat in their own ways that I was always on my own. I didn't like my brother. I still don't. But I was always the kid that.

Paul Cohalan: Have you only got one sibling?

Hayli Hooper: One full sibling. I've got two siblings. Step which are a lot older but like constant traveling, constantly own constantly poor parents who absolutely love and adore me. But all made. I've got. I count three parents. My mom, my dad, my stepdad. Even though they're all separated, they're all broke, they're all single, they've all had hard life experiences. So my drive came from simply not wanting materialistic things, but wanting enough money for choice and freedom.

Paul Cohalan: Do your own thing.

Hayli Hooper: So the Alpha thing comes with. There was no one there to. I've never had nothing handed to me. I've. I've fixed my own cars, I bought my own things. Like same Sam. I've always had three jobs, no matter what those jobs were. Even when I wasn't in the adult industry, I was a telemarketer working in a restaurant and a clothing store. Like I've always done resourceful hustle always got by on you and it's in your blood now. So the Alpha thing is so hard for me to let go. Let go. And the vulnerability is that if I had to nail down my biggest fault, it would be not letting people in because I don't like to feel vulnerable and I am so aware of my faults, I just don't know quite how to fix them. But that is the biggest thing that correlates to the Alpha is having hopefully meet someone that puts me in my feminine to feel safe. But yeah, blah, blah. So the Alpha comes from that.

Paul Cohalan: So anyone out there that thinks they can have that calm tone but also be an alpha, but also change from when you meet. Because when you meet, you've got to put her in a place, then come back and be an alpha.

Hayli Hooper: I want some of that respectfully.

Paul Cohalan: But if you come in and be an Alpha straight away, you'll probably punch on, so you've got to shift.

Hayli Hooper: I was like, my nugget, who I'm looking for is so small because it's also the same as, like, I get friends going, you're too picky. I was like, I'm not too picky. Everything I want is everything I offer. Someone that's financially stable, someone that's. That's got freedom, someone that's got drive, someone that's fun, that's someone that's fit. But I'm not a princess on a Stool, you know, with nothing to offer, asking for that. I have all that so why should I lower my.

Paul Cohalan: So that's what I was going to talk about before you mentioned about like you're a little bit of a threat being in your place.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Money, all that. And it comes back that alpha thing in the end because you're like I'm done. No one needs to save me now. I, I find a little bit because I like doing good stuff. I've worked hard to do it right. Like we all have and it's like even like just having a driver and that's because I haven't got a license. Yeah, I'm picking it up.

Hayli Hooper: What did you do?

Paul Cohalan: Nothing bad but all right, I'll tell you. So everyone knows anyway I was minus 19 points. I was still with my ex wife. 19 But they've got to issue it to you, right? So they didn't issue it. So I drove over eastern back in the range road with the wife and the kids 3 years ago 4 and then drove back. Got heaps of fines like 150k as interesting and the guy even goes I think you're over. But I was in a different situation state. So I come back and I walked in to Department of transport. It's a nightmare as we all know. Walk in, I'm like take it off me for however long. So I don't need, I don't Uber, whatever.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And they're like do you want to double or nothing? Which I've done years ago. So I double or nothing, right? No. So that was the 23rd of January I think and then the 24th of January. It was meant to end a week before it got done. West coast drive a week now that was the 24th of January. So I separated. April. Yep. Had no license. I think this is the way it went. And then I was meant to get it back 25th July. No, 24th July. Got caught driving out of Subiaco. I think this is the dates anyway it doesn't matter. Nine months extra. No, not drunk or anything but pulled out by a booze bus, no license and then no shit, August 22nd meant to get it back. I was over east with my brother in law. I was actually talking about this on another podcast the other day and I rang up at seven and I'm like I just want to pay the $50 for the license because when I fly home in two days because I was in Victoria and his brother in law's there and he already Had a joke going. Imagine if they didn't give it back. And the guy goes, no, you can't get it back till January 27, 2027. I'm like, so another nine months. This is August 22 this year. Yeah, last year. And he's like, I lost it. He goes, I'll hang up on you. I end up hanging up anyway. I've been waiting for this.

Hayli Hooper: What's that, like three years?

Paul Cohalan: Oh, yeah. So.

Hayli Hooper: Well, you could have just done that bitch that said the Double D. You should have just done the three months of nothing. Isn't it three months?

Paul Cohalan: So what month is it now?

Hayli Hooper: Because you. You dissing the options. I actually. Funny again.

Paul Cohalan: It wasn't August. It was.

Hayli Hooper: I had this discussion last night with a girl as well about. About points. And she's like, yeah, it's 12 months double nothing. Good behavior. Or it's three months clean lean, clean lose, but full reset. So I.

Paul Cohalan: Well, I should have took that.

Hayli Hooper: Oh my God. I would off overseas for three months and then come. Oh, go. I got done in kids.

Paul Cohalan: I had a while from kids, but.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, yeah.

Paul Cohalan: But what happened? So it was July 22nd, I think, so I got an extra nine months, not August 22nd. Cause we're fucking just there and I'm like, what for? I've done everything. I got electric scooter, so I don't drive, right? I left the gym I was at, so I didn't drive. Cause I was sneaking at 5 in the morning because can't get an Uber. Anyway, he's like, no, you gotta find. You got pulled over for a motorbike. I said, I got motorbikes, but I don't ride them. Fucking half a day I was in me assistant's room, office at her house and we got no work done. I was fuming. And it worked out. They took my scooter off me in February, right, because it was 2 kilo overweight, never gave me a fine or nothing, right. They reckon. They sent me court dates and fines to my apartment. I never got it. And because of that they gave me another nine months because it was two kilo over the like regulation, treated as a motorcycle. So unlicensed still and unregistered. So another nine months.

Hayli Hooper: That's a like electrical.

Paul Cohalan: Which I probably was going over 25 when they cops pulled me over, but. But they didn't tell me a thing. I got a video off the copper and everything, but if I went with a lawyer, it was gonna be seven grand and all this Y. I got a driver. I'D probably do more work. And I don't get parking fines. That makes up half of something.

Hayli Hooper: Isn't that crazy? So when the AI cameras came out. So right before I left for America, I got $2,200 worth of fines.

Paul Cohalan: Wow.

Hayli Hooper: In the space of, like, whatever time. Because, like, my seatbelt was under my boob because it was hurting my neck. I remember my phone holder is right next to my radio volume, so AI cameras cannot. It takes a second, you know. So they had such a backup in the courts that they had to give everyone one free pass with the seat belt.

Paul Cohalan: Is that right?

Hayli Hooper: They made over $20 million in fin. The first few months of them coming out, they backlogged the courts. So far, the courts, like, had a go at the state government going, you can't keep. Like, this is crazy. No one was aware they were coming out and everyone got smashed. My friend got done for her daughter, who was only 8 years old, not having a seatbelt. I was like, how are you going to control your kid playing around with their seatbelt?

Paul Cohalan: Wow.

Hayli Hooper: I paid. I don't know if I paid someone to take some fines because I was like, I am not losing my license. And years ago, I actually, I will say I again. It's always the points with the speeding, because I used to drive all the way up to Karratha, so you'd go, you know, 120 in a country road or something got done. Ridiculous at one point. Anyway, I found another girl. This time I was blonde. I found another blonde girl in the industry. Hired her car, didn't tell her I had lost my license. Looked up her Facebook profile, trial, found her date of birth, knew where she lived because I had to pick up the car. So just as a background, got pulled over by RBT and they're like, do you have your license? I'm like, I'm sorry. I don't. Well, who are you? Yeah, yeah, that is gold. Got away with it. And I never got caught, like, but, yeah, never. Then after that was pretty good.

Paul Cohalan: So I'll send it in when we finish.

Hayli Hooper: I think that statue of limitations, gone.

Paul Cohalan: That is so good.

Hayli Hooper: I was pretty smart about it, but,.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, I do not condone that. Yeah, but what a cool story.

Hayli Hooper: Like, we've all done naughty things, but, yeah, funny.

Paul Cohalan: And if that was the worst, you'd probably be doing all right.

Hayli Hooper: Certainly not the worst.

Paul Cohalan: So. So speaking of stories and naughty, like, you've been in the adult industry for how long?

Hayli Hooper: On and off, 23 years.

Paul Cohalan: Tell us. So when did you come To Perth. That's what I was going to ask you earlier.

Hayli Hooper: 12, 11 Years ago maybe. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Where are we? 20 Years.

Hayli Hooper: So this is actually the lowest longest I have ever stayed in 2014. 15.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, yeah, 15.

Hayli Hooper: I always moved every two years.

Paul Cohalan: So you are a.

Hayli Hooper: Absolutely. So I moved here two weeks after moving here, met a guy, got a job, everything just fell in place and that led me to staying for three years and then at the end of that three years I started enrolled in nursing. That led me staying another five years Covid happened. So I had no intention of ever staying this long, but it's just kind of rolled on.

Paul Cohalan: What's plans now?

Hayli Hooper: I always use Perth as a bird space because I have property here and I quite like Perth. Out of everywhere I've lived, it's.

Paul Cohalan: Everyone does. It's amazing place.

Hayli Hooper: It is, it's coastal, it's pretty, it's nice.

Paul Cohalan: We're very lucky.

Hayli Hooper: But I am bored of it now because there is no influx of new people in my hemisphere. You know, like I'm just not meeting people. It's the same people. There you go. So I don't really have plans. So when the waitressing wraps up in January, there was a nursing job that came up that's a consulting job where you can do it anywhere in the world. So it's like doing treatment plans for return. So something like that would keep my license open so I could have that in the back burner. I'm doing the online stuff and the online stuff, to be honest, actually goes well with traveling because it's fresh content all the time. So I would just. I'm thinking of maybe getting a visa to Spain and pop it over for a few months. Still work in America for a couple months.

Paul Cohalan: You know this. Well, it might go the other way but you know this puts a. A variable in there for this whole dating fucking getting someone on. You've already got a enough conditions.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. So again, Jay Shetty did this thing about the odds. You're talking about a numbers games and he's like perhaps the reason he literally said it is a numbers game. But the difference is when you have a lifestyle like mine there the numbers are so diminished because you're never in one spot for long enough. And he goes, if you are still single and you found yourself in that way, ask yourself, are you making it possible to the universe, Are you going.

Paul Cohalan: Anywhere regularly and don't chase it, but get out there.

Hayli Hooper: No. Yeah, but like he goes like literally if you have no regular place, no regular coffee shop, no regular gym or anything.

Paul Cohalan: Community.

Hayli Hooper: Community. Basically. How do you expect to build anything naturally off an app with someone? But again, I read people really quickly. If you have a bit of a spark, you have a bit of connection in my. If you're in Spain and I'm in Australia, I'll come over, whatever, be there tomorrow. Yeah. Like, I have the lifestyle. Lifestyle. When I do spend a significant time overseas and I meet people, for example, the three years, three months in America, every year I meet people. Like, the first thing I do is get on the dating apps because I've always thought that my person would be somewhere in a different country because they. They're a bit more open minded, they're a bit more entrepreneurial, they've got a bit more mindset. The mindset that we have and a few others in Australia is very limited here, like you meet every second person in Florida, in Miami is like that.

Paul Cohalan: You know, Is it really?

Hayli Hooper: Oh, my God. The, the stories and the people I've met. It was phenomenal. I'll tell you in a sec. But when I go over there, say at the beginning you meet something, they go, well, you're only here three months, so there's no point getting serious. I'm sorry. If I liked you, I would move here. Like, I'm. I've got the lifestyle.

Paul Cohalan: Maybe start with that.

Hayli Hooper: I have said that, but they don't believe.

Paul Cohalan: 2 Secs. This is where I. I bounce a lot, as you can see. Right. And that's why it's good when I don't know someone, because it's like. Yeah, it just flows. But then I'll get the feel of when it probably should. And they're all different. Some go two and a half hours, some one and a half. And it doesn't matter.

Hayli Hooper: So what did your. What do you aim for with your final cut?

Paul Cohalan: You'll find out.

Hayli Hooper: Okay.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, yeah. So it's not about final cut story.

Hayli Hooper: You don't have like a time frame, like, where every episode's like an hour?

Paul Cohalan: No, no. Fuck no.

Hayli Hooper: Okay.

Paul Cohalan: Because then I'm putting rules to it. Right.

Hayli Hooper: That's true. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: You don't want to be in it.

Paul Cohalan: Question thing.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Like we can sit here and chat and have a laugh. Why? Why? Try and drive it. And. Yeah, fucking picture it when it's funny.

Hayli Hooper: When people get so nervous with that. And I get it. I mean, I did acting as a kid. I was. I did theater, I did tv. So it comes very natural, this kind of setting. But I'm. I do. I Have seen people where they literally just freeze up. They need to prepare everything. They need to go everything.

Paul Cohalan: But then it's not so I get told. And this. I'm really grateful for this. And it's a bit of a selfish thing. Not selfish, but just my strength. Since Episode one, everyone's like, after it. They're like, fuck, you just provide that safe space. Even. Even Leo the other day, even where's they're like, fuck like you just because there's no rules. Right. But I can like pick the combo and I'm a people's person and I'm genuinely interested. Interested.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And they're like, you just let it flow like that. Safe space. And that's what this does. That's what the key is. That's actually the key.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, it is. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. We don't give a about that in the lights. See if it was all like about insurance or something to be like, yeah. Hey, what's coming to Wild Metal on us from.

Hayli Hooper: Welcome to the info commercial.

Paul Cohalan: So I do that as well, but I do it separate. I move this and put content here. So I. I'm actually looking forward to that. I've got a routine on it. What are you doing?

Hayli Hooper: You're doing another podcast for your insurance?

Paul Cohalan: No, not a podcast, but content.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, okay.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. Like risk advisor business and all that stuff. So. And I, I've struggled with that actually. This. I do this heaps easier.

Hayli Hooper: But anyway, I guess because you got to kind of make that somewhat sexy content, you know.

Paul Cohalan: Well, it's corporate. You got to watch what you say because you got to. You're not giving advice, but you're talking insurance.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: So I, I go down the whole natural path again, like because I'm from transport, mining and construction, all that. And like I talk about that stuff. Not insurance policy because it's like we can all talk about that but it's like.

Hayli Hooper: So I actually one of my. I tried to set up birth business instead of doing a third property and I have a million different ideas and one of them was dry hiring mining equipment.

Paul Cohalan: And so why you got that hat on? Who gave you that? I know them boys.

Hayli Hooper: Do you?

Paul Cohalan: Very well.

Hayli Hooper: I'm pretty sure I work for them up north, but I've worked 16 years or so was in these rural mining towns. And so I. My first conversation with guys is what do you do and how did you get into it? Because the amount of investment opportunities it's led to. So when I was talking about like looking for a business, at first I was going to do concreting trucks. Then the pump maintenance was looking a bit expensive and the contracts, you know, whether you go to BGC or Holcim or you do it yourself. So then I went into how about water carts for and I had a meeting with one of the biggest mining companies in Australia. Sat down, got good exposure. Also have a friend that's with BHP looked at their procurement deals and then again it was looking at, you know it's the kind of thing that if I wanted to set up it had legs but I would have to spend a couple years on the ground getting the contracts and I just don't have the time for it. But it's interesting because I looked at the insurances, the costs involved and so.

Paul Cohalan: You learn a lot.

Hayli Hooper: Oh so much. And it was a good idea. If I was in one spot that's.

Paul Cohalan: What them boys done RCG cranes lifting when they went out. So Noddy worked for Mammoet. That's how I knew him. He used to move equipment for me when I worked for BHP. Yeah so we used to move that equipment there.

Hayli Hooper: Isn't that so funny how all this.

Paul Cohalan: Happened on trailers and this company here I was a manager of and now they're a client of mine also when I was with BHP they carried the trucks on the tra. These trailers for me. Yeah, that actual brand dawns. Yeah, he's a legend. I'll work to and I'd love to get him on.

Hayli Hooper: Well the stories of these guys that I've worked for are just phenomenal. Like there was an Irish company, I can't remember but the guy started not even I would say three years ago. The job was in Perth so he must be local and the picture of his fleet now was phenomenal and the amount of staff he had and that was in within three years and then the boys up in Karratha and what I really appreciate about the male industry with construction is I guess the thing you've got that women don't have is you're on the ground and it all is about who you know. But you have that little bit announced and you put your balls to the wall and you go do it. And every single one I know has pretty much succeeded and done well.

Paul Cohalan: Wicked.

Hayli Hooper: And that's what I was envious of and I wanted a bit of a slice because for example the concreting trucks I had this great idea of one, you got a female led business two you put an indigenous on three you get CO2 friendly carbon commission emission concrete. You're hitting every tick. Right. But you need to be on the floor, have the people have.

Paul Cohalan: The go and blow an engine. Go. And you know there's, you got to put all that in place. Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: And that's what I mean is like women come into cold from that industry. So.

Paul Cohalan: And dry hire is a hard one as well. I got heaps of mates that do it. Like coming from that industry and contractors and stuff. It's a hard game. You've got to get ahead.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Because you can have breakdowns and have all that.

Hayli Hooper: Oh yeah, absolutely.

Paul Cohalan: Contracts with whoever and they don't give a fuck about your equipment.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And you know all that stuff on hiring, off hiring. Yeah. But, but you make it work. It's good money. It is. But you got to grind.

Hayli Hooper: So this is the thing, what I like about business is I don't care what the business is. Can the business make money? And then I want to learn about the business after the fact sort of thing. So I, I just, I get fascinated having these conversations with people. From learning all different aspects to energy, to mining, to minerals, to whatever. But there's so many opportunities in these random conversations.

Paul Cohalan: Especially WA.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, yeah.

Paul Cohalan: It's crazy.

Hayli Hooper: I know there's something.

Paul Cohalan: And you're a people and you're a people's person. So you don't have the thing with business. You don't have to know anything. No, go get the Michael Jordan.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Like because you don't want to be in it like a tradie and that. And then you're tied up like step back, build the business. Just like.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, yeah. I, I feel like there is something in the future in this sector for me but I don't know what it is yet. But it'll come later. So that's why I'm doing this. Well, there is because I just know there's more passive income businesses that I want to set up. But in the meantime, while I'm doing this, OnlyFans or traveling. I'm just going to get another property because that's a stable. Easy.

Paul Cohalan: So how many you got now? Three?

Hayli Hooper: No, two, but I'm going for the third.

Paul Cohalan: Where's the third?

Hayli Hooper: I'm looking now, so.

Paul Cohalan: Oh, so you're not sure if I.

Hayli Hooper: Could get a beach pad by Scarborough again? That would be amazing. So the one I've got now has got a 90 occupancy rate. It's six minutes from the beach. It's nothing fancy, it's just perfect location. And there was one that came up within the price range that I'm So pissed. I missed. But I was overseas in Vietnam when it came up. So if I don't find anything along this coastline, I would maybe do Sunshine Coast to the Gold Coast way. Not the Gold Coast, but Sunshine Coast. Or I would go overseas like Albania or something.

Paul Cohalan: That's where my business partner is. Sunny Coast.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: So I go there a bit. It's beautiful.

Hayli Hooper: I feel like the rest of Australia has really missed its market. It's. It's done.

Paul Cohalan: The Lulu bar is nice.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. Over that side. Anywhere by the coast, but either this section of the coast or up there. Everything else not really that interesting.

Paul Cohalan: All right, tell me these stories you got. You said you had a story or two overseas. Was it Florida or where were you?

Hayli Hooper: Well, there's. Oh. Oh, the interesting people.

Paul Cohalan: Something come to your mind?

Hayli Hooper: Oh, there was. I'm just talking about like the mindset, Right. So, for example, I was in a club and I was in like a. The VIP area and this guy walks past and I just look like such a dick. But anyway, I don't know what made me say something, but he opened his mouth and he had the most Australian accent ever. And he was young, like 30s. I was like, where are you from? And he goes, Mullumbimby. I was like, fuck off. Like, that's like right near Lismore.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: What are you doing over here? Blah, blah. And his story, I'm trying to remember his name. It's phenomenal. But I'll tell you the story. But all of the story was verified, like about four days after articles in the Sydney Daily Telegraph or whatever that major city newspaper is, did a whole article on it. So this guy at around about 17, was in America. He was an AI coder or whatever. And he got onto the black web and whatever, a dark web, whatever. And whatever he was doing over there was obviously illegal. And he got raided by the FBI. And the FBI gave him a choice. They're like, you either go to jail now for like 10 years, 20 years and get deported, or you work for us. And they recognized how smart he was. Now this guy developed some kind of software, so he did his 10 or 15 years with them. He also then developed some kind of software and successfully hacked or did something with Apple's software. And there was a lawsuit between Apple and him, and he was only person to ever win against their case.

Paul Cohalan: Wow.

Hayli Hooper: And anyway, he then, once he had the freedom to start his own tech company. The night I met him, he had just sold that for $350 million. And this story's getting wilder and wilder. There's a lot more to it. But it's. Anyway, he goes, yeah, I fly out tomorrow to the White House. I've got to do. I got. Just got the press, I just got a pass to be able to get me in. Flips open his wallet, sure enough is a White House VIP pass. And then he goes, yeah, I'm in talks with Elon Musk with my next tech company. And like opens up his phone, goes on Telegram, live group chat. You can see that it's going on. And this guy was so smart and his story was so crazy that he worked for the US Government in various forms. Forms something to do with tech. Anyway, sure enough, he goes, if you don't believe me, go get the Sydney mail in like a week. I've just finished an interview with them today, and it was all over the Sydney paper a week later. So the people that you meet there are just crazy. Like, I got from Oz. Yeah, from us, but also I got a Uber driver. It was an older lady and I was just chatting shit. And she was an ex beat cop in Washington D.C. for 10 years. Went into the FBI over there. Worked for the FBI for like 40 years. Her kids had kids, they would move to Florida. So she retired, moved over, grandkids were older. Now she was bored, starts Uber driving. You would never know that your Uber driver was an ex FBI agent. Like, their stories over there are just insane. Everyone's got drive, ambition. Because the other side of that is you're a idiot that's got three jobs and you're struggling to make it. So I'm not discounting all the stereotypes that fully exist in America, but I'm saying that the 1% is there so much more prevalent, especially in Florida. It's like Palm Beach, where I was staying is like the millionaire billionaire club of the world. And I just thrive on these conversations with these people and learn from them.

Paul Cohalan: So when was the last time you're there?

Hayli Hooper: Every year. So I just got back there from May, I believe, this year. Yeah. So I did three months America a month, Bali and then Vietnam, and then I did a five week work tour and then I go to Eastern Europe on Sunday.

Paul Cohalan: How long are you there for and where you going?

Hayli Hooper: Well, this is the thing about me is I buy the ticket and then I just always get the flexible ticket.

Paul Cohalan: So you did say that to me earlier this morning.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. So I got Albania, Bosnia, Montenegro, possibly tack on Malta at the end, flying into Greece, jumping over. And I've always wanted to do Malta and that's right near the airport where I'm going home. So I really only planned two weeks because September is busy for the waitressing because of all the footy final parties. So I don't really want to miss out on that. That. But if I'm having an amazing time.

Paul Cohalan: So you're going over there to work or just have fun. So no work at all.

Hayli Hooper: This is the first time I've had a holiday in, like, four years just to put on a backpack and go wander the earth by myself again. I used to do it all the time.

Paul Cohalan: So in a couple of weeks, if some guy comes, sweeps off your feet, you know that guy that we said you might not find because there's, like, all these conditions.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: You're just. You're not looking. Middle of bumfuck.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Well, hiking.

Hayli Hooper: It'll be in the Albanian hinterland and some random guy come out on a tree. You never know when.

Paul Cohalan: When you're not looking.

Hayli Hooper: I'm open to it. Like, I am open to meeting people, and I'm trying to, because I think I was especially as women gets like, 35 or so and the, you know, the fertility chat and all this sort of shit. So then you start meeting people going, oh, could this be the one? Like, you put too much heaviness on it too soon and overthink it, and it really skews your perception of who that person is, and you overlook things. So now I'm just like, whatever. Like, if you're a good time, if you're a fun time, if you're a long time, if you're whatever.

Paul Cohalan: Whatever. Whatever. Bucket.

Hayli Hooper: Whatever floats, babe.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. So when you. How long you been going over. What's the name for it? Like, where you went in May for.

Hayli Hooper: Three years or three, four years. Yeah. Yeah. So I just.

Paul Cohalan: What got you into that? Like, what made.

Hayli Hooper: I had two elderly dogs, and they were my children. They were my absolute babies. They got to 17 and they passed away three years ago.

Paul Cohalan: What kind?

Hayli Hooper: Maltese shih tzu, Maltese terrier, Mika and Nushi. And they saw me through so much of life, and they being a nurse, when one of them got kidney disease, I literally set up an IV doggy dialysis at home. And, like, I did everything for those dogs. They were my true world. And so when they died, they actually died very quickly. Like between, like two, three months between each other wiped me out. So I will never use the word silver lining or positive thing, but what changed in life is I got the ability to travel again more because they had been Sick for quite a few years. So I couldn't do it.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: So then I was just like it, let's go travel and make connections. And with the online stuff I could work anywhere in the world. And then I now have a second life in America. I've got really good friends. I've got.

Paul Cohalan: That's cool.

Hayli Hooper: A place I stay with. I've got American bank accounts, a car. Like I've got a whole set up there. Yeah. So I might buy a business over there and try and get the visa. I was looking at like commercial cleaning businesses or something. That's kind of.

Paul Cohalan: Your brain goes worse than mine does. That's unreal.

Hayli Hooper: My dad's like oh, another idea. Oh like dad, you just fucking do you know What? Okay. So 15 years ago when I went to America, I always look at America for whatever they have there. Takes 3 to 4 years to come over here easily froyo. 15 Years ago I saw it there, I was 25 or so I come back and I'm like I've got this great idea. You just outfit a shop, you put a 14 year old there. You've got no overheads. It didn't hit here for eight years. Years. And I just didn't have the money then. I've had so many opportunities in life where I had the knowledge, I didn't have the capital.

Paul Cohalan: That's Yo-Chi now.

Hayli Hooper: I would have fucking killed it.

Paul Cohalan: That's it is off the charts.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. And like it's only now popular. Imagine doing that so. So ahead of the game. So every time I travel I'm just looking at what do you got here that we don't have? Because Australia is very slow.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. It's good like that because there's a lot of smart things overseas. Right. Like we. We produce a lot tech, AI startups and all that kind of stuff. The other way what food, you know, wine and all that. But overseas there's some amazing stuff we wouldn't even know yet.

Hayli Hooper: I wish I was more tech because that is where it's at. So I'm constantly listening to podcasts about like investments. AI satellites, drones, the effect in energy and war and data centers and all this jazz. Because that is if you can't do tech yourself, at least know where to invest in tech. Because AI and tech is going to be robots.

Paul Cohalan: Robots Robots first going into warehouses already there.

Hayli Hooper: Well I was looking at. There's talk of now this is far in the future but I love a futuristic chart is data centers putting them in the orbit. So what they're Trying to do. Oh my God. I'll send you this chat. It was a fascinating thing. So there's a lot of backlash about data centers and the energy and the water that they take and how hard would it be to get them to be with. Because satellites used to be in the stratosphere, now they're in the low lying orbit and there's three different degrees of types of satellites and how long they last and how quickly they burn. And then space junk and all this jazz. So they're trying to. Google has actually got a thing called Sunseeker or Sun Catcher, something like that. And they've developed a team to study the ability to put data centers in.

Paul Cohalan: Wow, that's crazy stuff.

Hayli Hooper: I was literally doing a 16 hour drive and listening to these podcasts and I love space and so I'm looking at investing in things like that.

Paul Cohalan: So you must listen to Musk a bit.

Hayli Hooper: I not too much Musk. I do find him fascinating and I do think he's an interesting innovator. But I'm more interested in this. I think he, when you get to that level, particularly his political friendships, that he's got the corruption and the ability to manipulate between this is. I'm more interested in who's got his contracts to his contracts. Like who are the people, for example, the drones they use in war.

Paul Cohalan: That's why I said robots.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, well listen, like who's making the metal that goes on the chips? So I'm not saying it a little bit more stable, a little less being able to be fucked with, but still a player in the game.

Paul Cohalan: I was talking to mate the other day about it, he wrote me this big story script. I'll fucking send it to you actually about bots, robots and that, right?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And I've been watching it like Dan Martell, the AI guy, he invests in robots and warehouses because that's where it's all going to be tested. But Ben was saying to me the other day and I read this thing he sent me, like at the moment houses are built for us. Great thing with robots. Robots can work around however we are. Right?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: But like all this is going to change when we have robots in the house and we are going to like, it's just, it's going to happen and like you watch like look at the AI robots and that like Tony Robbins and that got. I watched one the other day. He's we're like 1% of doing any of this what's already out there. Right. And Tesla, it's not about the Cars.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, well, what's already out there is 1% of what we know. Imagine what else is out there that has. We have not been told about.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, no, that's what I'm getting.

Hayli Hooper: Like all the, it's like the. It's just scary to think about all the things that the government knows, like match what they were doing 10 years ago we're only hearing about now. Like, so they're all. They're already 10 years ahead and they're not going to let us know that for fact.

Paul Cohalan: And there's an agenda and you know, even oil and the war, all the distraction. My belief is it's all about the financial system, which is shifting right now as we speak because I watch it every night. I sat up at fucking 3 o' clock last night watching it all goes back to crypto and blockchain and all that shit. It's shifting right now, the financial system. And I believe because of oil and prices and all that, it's already kind of planned and it's there for a reason. It's a distraction and that happens a lot in the world.

Hayli Hooper: This is again something somewhat. I had this discussion again the other day is what ties in with the kid discussion. I am so hesitant now to know whether I even want kids because I think about what world are we leaving them and where is it going? Because it's so easy. I mean, I try.

Paul Cohalan: We're not gonna know.

Hayli Hooper: No, but it's gonna know. But like, it's already. I try and be a very positive person, always seeing the positive and try and tune out all the clickbait and the news that try and do it. But it is like a depressing kind of outlook where life is becoming so much harder for the everyday person. And you've got to really try and get ahead of the rat race because there is so many things brewing and there's so many wars and there's so many.

Paul Cohalan: Whatever's out of your control, don't worry about it.

Hayli Hooper: No, I know it is, but it makes press. I'm glad I'll be dead by then.

Paul Cohalan: You're a positive person, right? Like I'm the opposite. I don't get caught up on that. Like, what, I shouldn't have a kid because I don't know what's going to come in. Who gives a. He'll work it out. Because it's like, that is true. But it's like us working our generation. Imagine if it's our parents thought, yeah, I'm not gonna have kids because don't know what the world's gonna be like. We wouldn't be here having a podcast.

Hayli Hooper: That is. That is a. That is a good. That is a good.

Paul Cohalan: It's not your problem.

Hayli Hooper: That is. It's not my problem. But that is a good point. On the other token of that, it doesn't.

Paul Cohalan: I just don't want.

Hayli Hooper: No, no, no. It doesn't hurt if one or two people out there in every group thinks about because the world's overpopulated and we could do with a bit of a cull.

Paul Cohalan: Well, I used to think it was overpopulated. Right.

Hayli Hooper: It is.

Paul Cohalan: Well, you listen to who we just talked about Musk and they reckons we're not.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, of course. I think there's an egotistical drive just the same as like Putin's trying to encourage everyone to have eight kids now because they've obliterated their male population. But even. Who's the other one? Nick Cannon with 14 children. And they're just breeders. Yeah, they're just fucking 14.

Paul Cohalan: Imagine the practicing that goes to that.

Hayli Hooper: Imagine organising your rosters for your child support week on, week off, whatever. These kids wouldn't even know his name.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, very true. Fuck it. Else. What else was I going to ask you? There was something. Something else. What else can we talk about? This is. This is a bit. It's good.

Hayli Hooper: It's that hot, isn't it? Yeah. Well, what about your story of. Where did theme of resilience and all this come from?

Paul Cohalan: Probably from my journey, which actually I'm going to. I'm going to do a separate cast of my actual life.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And I've been. I've always wanted to do a timeline of events for myself, but now doing this, I'm like. And I share anyway. I'm pretty vulnerable and honest. There's some stuff that I. I hold back, but I probably won't and I'm probably worried about it.

Hayli Hooper: But you know what you should do? You should get your ex wife on here, you two have a chat. That would. Interesting.

Paul Cohalan: No, we're not at that point. There's a couple years away. Do you know who I would. I'd get her father on. I got so much respect. Yeah. Like we butted heads heaps, but were heaps alike.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: But he taught me a lot. I worked for him first.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: He's an amazing man. He actually just rang me the other day and gave me the best phone call and message this morning.

Hayli Hooper: Wow.

Paul Cohalan: And we don't speak a lot, but when I see Them, my mother in law and father. Ex father in law.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Always give me a kiss. Say good day. They're Croatian. Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: What's your advice, Aussie?

Paul Cohalan: I got married in Split in Croatia. That was amazing. Yeah. Because they got property in that there. So there's. So there's so much.

Hayli Hooper: Did you go to Hvar?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. Yeah. I think my mother in law, she's going to kick my ass. Is Br or. No, she's not from Hvar. She br. My father in law was from Vats. I would say it wrong, but it's up in the goats up in the hills and I love going to both. It's actually where I had the best cheese and bread up there where his mum was born in the house and he. I think him as well or something. Wow. But we had this. I think it was goat's cheese wrapped up in sheep's wool. We had the bread and cheese up there in the middle of bumfuck. Just me and him drove up. I love that.

Hayli Hooper: But this is the thing about traveling is this is why I have such an addiction to it. And this is.

Paul Cohalan: What are you doing? Spinning my podcast around me. Anyway.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, there you go.

Paul Cohalan: I like it. I like it.

Hayli Hooper: Well, this is what I mean is like traveling for me, this is what I struggle with. The other side of like being in America is most of the Americans don't even own a passport. But even I met people in. In Western Australia has never even left Western Australia. How do you not want to go and experience the world? When I travel, I don't want to do the tourist shit. I want to meet a local. I want to go to where they go.

Paul Cohalan: Some haven't been to Rottnest.

Hayli Hooper: No, I know. It's crazy. Like, the world is so big. How can you be okay with living in this little bubble? And often I meet a lot of like tradies who are in that bubble that I just want to go and, you know, have a beer at the pub and have a gamble and go home. They don't know any better, which is fine.

Paul Cohalan: I wish that was their culture.

Hayli Hooper: I don't want to say I wish I had that simpleness. But they are. And I don't mean that in a negative way. Their life is simple and they're happy.

Paul Cohalan: With it and we need them people too. Right? The world goes around with different people.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, absolutely. But I just have this undying thirst to see everything and experience everything. And like I have that constant worry of make money, get ahead in your career, but also do this while you're young experience because you can always make money again.

Paul Cohalan: Always.

Hayli Hooper: And.

Paul Cohalan: And you don't need a shitload. Like it's like I put 10 mil in the bank. Are you happy?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Yes. It does make you happy for a bit. But it's like what fills your cup and gets you out of bed in the morning. That's. That's the big piece. Right. What makes you happy now? I like. I loved it. I never went overseas except I lived in Tasmania for three years. I used to say I went overseas but when I got with my ex wife she took me overseas in 2000 I got together. 08. So went over in 2010. That's proposed top of the Eiffel Tower.

Hayli Hooper: Wow.

Paul Cohalan: I think I sweat now in this room. Big sweats here. The top restaurant. The Michelin star restaurant at the top. And it was cool. It was cool. We had a really good laugh about it. I left and I was gone for ages. And I thought I was going to drop the ring in the sink. It was like in the movies, but slow mo. And I was gone for ages. Had big sweat patches come out, got one knee. The whole place stopped. We're in the middle of the restaurant. It was raining. It was actually beautiful. And anyway that was Paris and whatnot. That was 2010. But I'd never been overseas either.

Hayli Hooper: Wow.

Paul Cohalan: So she showed me that. I'm really grateful for that. 2010. So what am I now? 43 At 26. Going back 16 years.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Is that right? 1033. I fucked him on there. I'm usually all right on it. But anyway. So 2012, we got married there in Split.

Hayli Hooper: Wow.

Paul Cohalan: In the old palace which was built in 305 AD for the king.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Even though he only lived not long after it. But when we got married in. I think it's called Vete. The church, the cathedral. We're standing on archbishops buried Archbishop. Like Australia's been here since breakfast. And I really, really. I love Australia. Especially when you come home after six weeks. Like you still can. You can't beat home. Right. I love the history and appreciate it so much and the learning. And I was sitting on the iPad back then.

Hayli Hooper: I love it too. I remember my girlfriend's grandparents house in the UK up near Manchester. Most English manor I've ever seen was their own manor. Their own house was built in 1770. And I was like, how is your house as old as our country? Like well discovered but crazy. And then going to certain areas. Areas in Spain or Serbia actually. There was a. I can't remember the name of the place, but there's four walls obviously of like this street. And each wall of this building was from a different era. So one was, and I'm talking hundreds of years. So one was riddled with bullets from the war. One had like sword marks from 19, 1800s, 1700s. And just the history in this square of these four adjoining walls that came from different centuries of our time.

Paul Cohalan: And it's why we are where we are, whether we're in a different country or not. Like the world's orig evolved, right? Like it comes back to all in, you know, all that stuff, the wars of whatever. Like it's cool, it's really cool and there's so much to learn. Like you can really go down the rabbit hole with it.

Hayli Hooper: But that's what I mean. It's like it shows something about a person if you have interest in that or not. And that probably is one of the first things I ask a person when I meet them, like on dates and stuff is do you have interest? Have you traveled?

Paul Cohalan: Have you left your city?

Hayli Hooper: Are you, are you interested in what's going on in the rest of the world? You know, says a lot about a person and how self involved they are.

Paul Cohalan: It does actually, whether they're interested or not. But once again, they don't know what they don't know. So if they've never been exposed or even thought about it, they're not going to know. But that's the limiting factor.

Hayli Hooper: Not think about it when you're in your 30s.

Paul Cohalan: Well these days, yeah, definitely. Because social and you know. Yeah, yeah, definitely. Bali. Talk to me about Bali. You love it.

Hayli Hooper: Hey, no, I know. I used to, I, I went. So I take my parents on holidays for the past three years just because I think like when they're older life shouldn't be looking at a death door, that they should still have fun.

Paul Cohalan: Awesome. Where are your parents?

Hayli Hooper: So my mum is in South Australia, my stepdad is in northern New South Wales. My dad's in the Gold Coast and so first year I took them all to Greece.

Paul Cohalan: Do they all get along?

Hayli Hooper: No, not really. So my, my mum and dad separated when I was six months old. My mum, my stepdad married when I was 10, divorced when I was 20. So everyone's been divorced for a long time. My mom and my stepdad pretty much get on. My mum and my dad really do not and my stepdad and dad somewhat don't. So when I paid for this holiday in Greece I took them to Athens, Santorini and Naxos. And for four of us, it was expensive. And I made them a promise. I said, if you fight, you're paying your own airfare home. Which I didn't mean, but I did try and pressure them into it. And it was also my birthday over there, so. So I got four days in. It was amazing. And then they started fighting on my birthday and then it all went to shit. So now I take them all on separate holidays. But my mum wanted to go. She went to Bali this last year and she actually had forever sworn off Asian countries. Cause she doesn't like their death penalty, she doesn't like the way they treat animals and blah. And she actually had a great time and it changed her perspective about it.

Paul Cohalan: That's so amazing.

Hayli Hooper: It was amazing. So the only reason I went was to spend time with her because she was a week on her own doing a healing thing. And then I went and spent spend a week with it. But I previously had gone so often because Perth and Bali, so close, it lost its charm. Like the Europeans came in. It got pretentious, it got expensive. It's become an influencer thing.

Paul Cohalan: Where's your favorite place to go?

Hayli Hooper: What do you mean? Not Bali?

Paul Cohalan: No, in Bali.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, in Bali. Oh, God, look outside of Canggu. So there's this area between Seminyak and Canggu where it's not yet overpopulated. Or Lembongan, the island.

Paul Cohalan: I haven't been there yet.

Hayli Hooper: The islands are really cute. I prefer them. Yeah. To get out, but yeah. So it's changed. So when I went this year, I started to like it again, but I hadn't been for the past four years. I took a break from it.

Paul Cohalan: I was gonna go this week actually.

Hayli Hooper: Really? I would take a plane to Thailand any day of the week. Over Bali?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: Like Thailand is so much prettier, cheaper, nicer.

Paul Cohalan: I only went once.

Hayli Hooper: Did you?

Paul Cohalan: I'll tell you. And you know the person, I. It was his 30th, I didn't drink all 2018. And then I cut instead of waiting the whole year. Cause I'd done a year with it with my ex wife. Wife's uncle. But November, we'll flying end of November, we'll fly to Koh Samui. Quinny.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, yeah.

Paul Cohalan: So we're really close mates.

Hayli Hooper: And went.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, went over there for his 30th.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: We all had shirts at the airport.

Hayli Hooper: It would have been a loose trip.

Paul Cohalan: Oh, come back buckled. Yeah, like dehydrated. Everything I. I'll share something. Actually. No, I won't share.

Hayli Hooper: No. Okay. Yeah, come on now.

Paul Cohalan: So I come back and for 12 months this is how I found out I was diabetic. I have not shared this on camera and I will fuck it, I share it with everyone else. So for 12 months I wasn't circumcised, right?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And I had cuts and dry and. Cause you're pissed, everything hard to heal, steroid cream and that didn't heal right.

Hayli Hooper: And then go, I thought you got AIDS.

Paul Cohalan: No, go over there, drink piss for seven days, dehydrate, you know, you're a guys, you don't look after yourself the best, you know, sleep a little bit, get up and drink and whatever else and just like wear the body out and go home, you know. I was just like a week later or something. I'm like, Megan, I had to get the snip anyway with me and the ex wife agreed to get the snip. I rang the doc, I said, you said elimination. So like let's just get the circumcision done. This is like, what was I, 36 or something like that? And went in the next day the specialist, he goes straight away goes, are you diabetic? I'm like divine, I love chocolate. But he goes, that means. Anyway, he goes, I got a cancellation where I want to do the snip and the circumcision. The one thing put me to sleep and I'll test you for diabetes.

Hayli Hooper: So hang on, why were you getting circumcision at this later day?

Paul Cohalan: Because of the cuts and dry skin, I couldn't heal it and it was mega pain and seven days of drinking piss and dehydrated and you know, with seven lads.

Hayli Hooper: So you just had poor healing capabilities for the diabetic.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, that's the end thing. But like the doc never said, hey, you could be diabetic and tested.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, they never tested that.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, don't know. Look, I'm glad now actually, I'll tell you something else about it. I'm really glad now, like it better, whatever, but got the snip at the same time, found out I was diabetic. So that was the start of 2019. I'll blame Quinny for that, but it was actually, it was a good thing in the end. And you know, the thing that got me is my boy being non circumcised and me being circumcised. Just a, just a.

Hayli Hooper: That you're different.

Paul Cohalan: Just a father son thing. Right. Really mark my words, not my decision. When he was 8. When he's 7, went and got him checked because it wasn't doing what it's meant to. And then they go, that's okay. It's common. But by the time he's eight, if it doesn't work, he has to have a circumcision.

Hayli Hooper: Wow.

Paul Cohalan: Had to have it.

Hayli Hooper: Really.

Paul Cohalan: How interesting right off.

Hayli Hooper: How interesting that's like a couple.

Paul Cohalan: Of years or a few years or whatever the it was. I can't remember.

Hayli Hooper: But the diabetic healing thing is a problem. My father. So my stepdad is 81, fit as a fiddle. My mom is 72 or 3, not that fit, but she's, she does all right. She can walk around. But my dad years of like smoking and all that jazz. It's got Carter calcified arteries, which is different to plaque. So it's thick and it doesn't break off. Anyway, long story short, got a cut in his toe, wouldn't heal. Not he was borderline diabetic because everyone pretty much after that age gap years anyway, had to get an amputated and then found out he had poor blood flow, had to flip an artery. Anyway, it's been a two year saga with the body healed, healing and it's all come down to like cutting out sugar. Cutting out because it's a great inflammation marker. And it just highlighted how when you get old, the tiniest thing can derail your life. And my stepdad also had a cut in his foot that just wouldn't heal for like three years. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: CGM.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Live for sugar and I'm hopeless. But that's. That's unreal. Hey. So. So for him it shifted that quick, eh?

Hayli Hooper: Oh my God. So he got a cut and within four days it went necrotic and it just wouldn't. The blood flow was so poor there and perfusion and he just couldn't heal. And it was like you're either going to have to lose your foot at this point and it will keep extending unless we can restore that blood flow and get you to heal. And then they did an artery that had a vein flip by doing a femoral artery bypass. And long story short, it allowed the toe to heal to the point of four months, bang on the dot. Soon as it healed or fell apart again. But it allowed him to heal enough to not lose anything more. But now they have to start the same issue again. So he can now never get a cut on his feet again unless he wants to lose his legs. Like so it's Crazy, isn't it?

Paul Cohalan: They reckon it's worse than, like, it's one of the worst things because it's a silent killer. Right.

Hayli Hooper: But you also can't because if you're diabetic and you've got poor blood flow, you don't feel your feet, so you don't know you've got an injury until it's too late.

Paul Cohalan: The other day when I'm like squinting the last fucking few weeks, I'm like, this diabetes is not getting me eyes. Cause that's the other thing that goes. You go on. I'm like, I'm not going to tell anyone. But I had to go get.

Hayli Hooper: You got to not bury your head under the sand.

Paul Cohalan: Like health and wellness is everything and it's hard. I, I, I've struggled the last couple of years because you drink piss you up and down and like when you're not training, like I'm back training that now I'm actually in a good spot. I don't take meds. I'm like, if I can't keep it in order by being healthy and eating.

Hayli Hooper: Right and training well, particularly our age,.

Paul Cohalan: It's only Metformin tablets, right?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And you can take berberine or whatever the herbal. It's just the same shit. They reckon. Follow that. Gary Brecka, he goes on about diabetes, type 3 diabetes. What do you think it is?

Hayli Hooper: Type 3?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. What is it? You'll go, oh, not a lot of people know this. Gary Brecka talks about this.

Hayli Hooper: So one is your body, two is your lifestyle, three would be. So what they think gives you diabetes. It's a third one, is it?

Paul Cohalan: No, actually what it is, Alzheimer's, dementia.

Hayli Hooper: No. That's horrific. That's my worst.

Paul Cohalan: And when you're like, now someone's like, fuck my. Even the other day my grandfather was in her home, you know, dementia. Did he have diabetes? Yeah, it's a bit more, I'm not.

Hayli Hooper: Saying all the time, I honestly think that we're, we're all fucked.

Paul Cohalan: Because commercial food, sugar, it's processed.

Hayli Hooper: It's the food and it's the drugs. Not even partying drugs, which by the way, like that generation is still pretty fucked. But it's the prescription Drugs we're giving 10 year olds Ritalin and, you know, pure amphetamine speed to go in their brain six times a day. You've got food sitting on shelves at like a lower cost. A hot, a long shelf life. Especially in America, like our, you can do whatever you want to your body all the science and technology is great for our body. We can fix everything. We have not made any improvements in the brain. And no one has been able to prolong brain health to the point where Alzheimer's is. The ratio of the damage we're doing to the technology of prolonging your brain health is not correlating. And there is going to be a massive influx of dementia. I think, however, genetics still plays a huge part of it and I'm so thankful my family has no trace of it. But I mean, it just doesn't negate what I gotta.

Paul Cohalan: Like, you know, if you're overweight that you get diabetes like that. Right. Or be on the border. I can't even go lose a weight. I've just gotta, I've gotta eat like steak, eggs, avocado in the morning, like no carbs and get there. I've actually got a chat with a coach today, actually. He used to be here. He's in Tassie now. And I'm like, give me a nap, tell me what to eat. I've gotta be strict. I couldn't do it before, I just wasn't ready. You know when you've gotta be ready to do it, like always train on and off, but I'm not consistent enough. But this is why I said when I restart this, I'm doing 52 weeks. So I'm trying to push myself because I'm too go back to ADHD and whatever business. And business trumped everything for me. But I learned a lot the last 12 months, two years, and it doesn't. So that's why I can go and do stuff now.

Hayli Hooper: What I mean, you are nothing without your health.

Paul Cohalan: Like it all goes out the door. You can have a million dollars, $2 work, business.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Everything stops.

Hayli Hooper: And I think I did a couple fasts. I did a 21 day.

Paul Cohalan: I've never done one.

Hayli Hooper: Really? Well, I did a. Okay, so I put this in a short story. Small intestine, small intestinal bacterial overgrowth. It's called SIBO. It's a very common gut disease that people have that is not readily diagnosed. It's one of the last things GPs ever tell you to do. But a lot of people suffer from it.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah.

Hayli Hooper: Anyway, depending on your score, mine was so severe, antibiotics only reduce the bacterial over half. So the next step is either do them again, which I said no to because they fucked my white blood cell count. So they go, okay, well. And the other way is their cell cycle has a 14 day renewable cycle. So you cannot eat for 21 days. And so there is a diet called the Elemental Shake. And it has trace nutrients to keep your body. It's a perfect balance to keep your body alive.

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: It's what we give people in comas or esophagus trauma. It's tiny amount three times a day. Tastes like shit. And you'd only have like green peppermint tea which with it. Right. So I cut off. I was on three to five coffees a day. I'd have sugar, not a lot, but alcohol, everything. So I went cold turkey on absolutely everything. Didn't eat for 21 days. Didn't drink for six weeks. Didn't do sugar for like eight weeks. And it was the best thing I have ever, ever done. I felt so amazing. I didn't get headaches, I was working out every day. It was a mental challenge. Going on dates and dinners and watching people eat in front of you and just knowing because I was so desperate for a fix for my issue.

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: I'm like, that's just not for me. Like I, I could just, I.

Paul Cohalan: And you were really comfortable in it.

Hayli Hooper: I was really comfortable for the first time. I did a follow up one six months later because partying in America kind of backtracked me and sent me in.

Paul Cohalan: And I self inflicted.

Hayli Hooper: I only did 14 days because obviously my bacterial load was a lot less. And it was horrific. It was the was it mindset. It was. I think your body just immediately went in to go, oh fuck, not this again. And it knew and it's. And it was. I struggled so hard mentally. I was starving, I got headaches, I was exhausted. I had such a different experience and I was so confident going into it going that was.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, I'd done it last time.

Hayli Hooper: It was horrific. But I also like. And everyone's just like just give up. Just don't worry about it. You don't need it. And I was like, I refused.

Paul Cohalan: Did you do the whole lot?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. So I refused to give up. I like the challenge, but would I do it a third time? Probably not.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, we'll leave that one there.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. So it's interesting. I like those challenges for health. You've got to give your so bas. Basically what it does is it starves your whole intestinal tract so you can reheal with natural gut microbiome so that to do to your body a couple times in your life is so phenomenal with its health benefits. So as we're talking health is wellness. All these little things you can do even if you only do them Once it's going to put you so much further ahead.

Paul Cohalan: I was going to do a water fast, right. But I, I, I was looking it up, you know what's wicked. And I have heaps of this anyway. Probably Marino Waga, Croatian olive oil. Right. Cause we used to get on the in laws farm. Cause me and my wife actually planted heap of trees. So I have it heaps anyway. But what olive oil does is something in it. It speeds up the autophagy process, which is what the greatness of fasting is. Because it eats your bad cells first.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And then whatever days it is. Listen to that fucking Gary Brecka. He's a wizard and dumbs it down. You know, you redo your cells over however many days. But that's what a fast does, right? But olive oil speeds it up. So instead of just doing a water fast, you can do an olive oil fast. And I was looking at this not long ago and I reckon I'll do it. I reckon I need it really hard.

Hayli Hooper: A water fast, but then also like a dash of.

Paul Cohalan: Well, it's an olive oil fast. You have whatever he says. This, this one guy's researched and he used to do water fast and now he goes, I do this.

Hayli Hooper: No, but you can't have that much olive oil over four days. You need a shit ton of water.

Paul Cohalan: Not 14 days. I'm talking like a 72 hour.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, but like isn't the water fast? You'd be drinking liters and liters a day. Like how many liters? Like how. You could only have a little bit of olive oil a day, couldn't you?

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, yeah. You're not sculling liters of olive oil.

Hayli Hooper: Absolutely. Can you have water?

Paul Cohalan: Oh no. You might. No, you'd probably have water with it. I can't remember what he said, but yeah, but it's speeds it up. It's more about the olive oil than just the.

Hayli Hooper: You probably shit yourself a lot too because.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, probably.

Hayli Hooper: Isn't that what it does? It like trains it out, but cleans out. I've actually heard oils particularly. Is it castor oil for parasite cleansers.

Paul Cohalan: Is that right?

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. So if you freeze castor oil, which apparently takes like a week to freeze them in the thing and then you take a bunch of tablets with them. I don't know what it is. I need to read the article full, but I've seen a lot about parasite cleansers using oils to get rid of them.

Paul Cohalan: Tell me, are you a nurse?

Hayli Hooper: Nurse, yes.

Paul Cohalan: We haven't talked about that's one question I was going to throw at you. Tell me about that and then we'll wrap it up.

Hayli Hooper: Okay, so I did two nursing degrees. I started as an EN, then went into RN, the conversion. So that's enrolled nurse to registered.

Paul Cohalan: Where'd you do this?

Hayli Hooper: In Perth. So I did an international school for the EN and then went to ECU for bachelor of science. And yeah, my God, that's hard. So you do about a year's. In the four years that I did this studying, you have to give X amount of time placements. So I was a mature age student with two mortgages having to work, you know, about a year's worth of free labor for the Australian hospitals, which is so hard. There's nothing there. With my last prac, they put me on 40 hours a week of night shift for free. Like just insane labor that they do. The thing about nursing, it makes me very passionate. I love the job, I love the blood and gore, the adrenaline. But they are treated. I barely do it these days because they treat it like shit. There's no support. A cleaner gets paid more than you. A bartender is on the same wage as you. You go to jail if something goes wrong. Yeah, it's. They have a nursing crisis around the world, but particularly in Australia as well. And everyone's like, well, pay them more like literally. I was at a restaurant in the Queensland with my dad. I took him to a nice fancy restaurant and I got to pay and the owner of the restaurant was there and he looked at me real shitty when I didn't leave a tip and I was like, I'm sorry, I googled it. I was like, your waiters are on $35.50. What do you think of basic nurses on $32 and saying else? Yeah, why am I tipping them when no one's tipping like nurses? Like we're not in America or Europe where I would. Because they're on $5. That's their model and that's their model here. I'm sorry, like the nurses are so undervalued. But I do love the job. So anyway, I do agency nursing, so it's one of the harder ones because there's no support and you're expected to know where everything. So I've done everything from maternity. Even though I'm not a midwife, they still put nurses in there for the moms, GPs, oncology, hematology, rehab, ortho, aged care, community care, all of it. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Wow.

Hayli Hooper: I did a charity trip to the Philippines where they send you out for two weeks and do diabetic education, orphanages, oncology. Oncology. That was amazing. That was really cool. It's one of the best things I ever did.

Paul Cohalan: How long ago was that?

Hayli Hooper: Three years ago, perhaps. I've wanted to do it again, but that one was organized through the university and I was a little disheartened at the end of it because I have a big Instagram following and I had people donating stuff. And then I passed it on to the thing and I found out it never made it to the people it was intended. The school that was a correlating school in the Philippines took it all for them, for their staff. And that school was a rich school. And I'm like, you can afford your own. I had someone donate 200 stethoscopes, which would have been amazing for village medical centers. And the teachers at this rich school took it. And I was like, you've got the money for your own stethoscopes. Like, so it really kind of put a sour taste after it. But when I was over there, we raised $10,000 and we. We put a couple kids through college there. It cost $1,700 to send a village kid to university. Like nothing for a 14. So we put two kids through college. Then we did.

Paul Cohalan: Are you still connected with them?

Hayli Hooper: No, it was so long ago. They do give you updates. They used to. I got in trouble with ECU about.

Paul Cohalan: That would not surprise me about the.

Hayli Hooper: OnlyFans and the nursing. So right. Right before the trip, I just finished my degree and I had a little cupcake in my ECU and I was in the hospital and I was like, yay. Doing a little story about finishing and someone had reported me. So I obviously had someone at the uni that didn't like me. And basically they had screenshot it because it was a story. So it only lasts 24 hours. It wasn't on my post. So they had. Someone had to have reported and seen it screenshot all within a timeframe. And I got caught in this meeting. And they're like, you are bringing ECU into disrepute because you've got an ECU logo on your shirt on an Instagram page that has an adult link on it. And we're going to take you off this Philip the Philippines trip. And I'd won a scholarship for this. And I said, no, you're not. Because one, like, I don't self promote. Two what I do on my own time. Anyway, I had heavily researched what my rights were and I fought them on it. And I won. And they go, all right, we'll let you go, but you can never promote anything to do with ecu. You must make your page on private while you're on this trip and so forth. And she sits me down, she goes, I just want you to know that you'll struggle in nursing and you'll probably never get a job and blah, blah. And I was like, fuck you. I ended up, long story short, being in the media for like two years about the nursing stripping co life and every single time an article came out, I'll get job offers like the next day. Like, no, it had no effect whatsoever. I never talked about my work. No one ever knew where I was.

Paul Cohalan: She jealous that she didn't have an OnlyFans.

Hayli Hooper: No, it was just run by old bitchy ladies. And that's the problem that got so political. But if anyone's out there, because there's a lot of strippers that are nurses because it pays so they have sex. Second jobs. Stick to your guns. Do both like the old in the office, because they don't know what they're talking about. Like, the world is different now.

Paul Cohalan: Do you know what? It's. It's not normally this, like so much, but I don't know you and it's like, yeah, you do so much different stuff, which is really cool.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: So it's more of a casual chat because you're pretty casual too. Yeah. Not that the others aren't, but it's like business or it's whatever, but it's got a focus.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: But more than I. I never thought it did. But now that you've sat here and you've got like 20 different things going on.

Hayli Hooper: But this is my thing is I think it's. I'm happy to be an example because I think people are told that they can't have it all and they're told that you have to do a certain thing and you have to knuckle down.

Paul Cohalan: No rule book.

Hayli Hooper: No, there is no rule book. And if you work hard, play hard,.

Paul Cohalan: Why not try, fail, try again. Like in the 20s. Like, Gary Vee goes on about this a lot. It's like you got to work it all out. White picket fence, like off that does not need to happen these days. Yeah. Stay at home longer if you can get your uni and do all that stuff. You know, it's hard out there money wise and all that, but go try. Shit.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Fuck it up. Dislike it.

Hayli Hooper: The average age of moving out of home in Sydney is these days 35. Because of how crazy their accommodation and rental prices are that people have to stay with parents so long to get through uni to be able to afford. Then they're starting a career, then they're paying back the uni debt, then they're out of home.

Paul Cohalan: Just go straight out, start a business and learn on the way.

Hayli Hooper: You know what? Fuck uni. To be honest, that's what I'm getting.

Paul Cohalan: That's what I'm getting at.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, it's such a wank.

Paul Cohalan: One more story very quick and then I'm gonna get to the end. Come on, give me a cracker. Adult, adult industry. There's got to be a story that comes to mind.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, there's so many stories. I mean, I've rocked up to jobs where there's people on the roofs of industrial factories with firecrackers in their ass and then they've accidentally set the neighbor's property on fire because one of the firecrackers went off and it was a dry grass season and I'm rocking up to the job and everything's on fire and the farmer guys can coming and all the girls are running away and I'm like, well, I guess I'm not working that job. But then even like traveling, like when I travel, I'm a wild. When I travel solo, I tend to go just a lot harder. I got arrested for stealing a rowboat in Portugal once after a night club. I got the security policy. A security policy at a hotel changed because I accidentally fell asleep naked in the reception and left some guy in my bed, which was an all female dormitory. And they woke up screaming and everyone's eating breakfast next to me when I'm naked in the thing that I thought was my bedroom. But yeah, like, that's just one story. Life is to be lived, to get out there and have fun. I party hard, I work hard. I've met amazing people from all walks of lives. I have friends all over this world. I know the balance of responsible chaos. I will still live that chaotic lifestyle, but I still turn up and pay my bills and do my responsibilities. But you give me an inch, I'll take a mile and I'm gonna go fucking have fun with it.

Paul Cohalan: Good on you. That's amazing. I love that. And I love that you're so open and transparent about it. Like it's fucking naked.

Hayli Hooper: But that's the thing, like people don't be perfect. You gotta celebrate. There's days where I wake up and it is overwhelming.

Paul Cohalan: And do you know what a nugget will be for, like, out of this, I think for you, like, you've taught me a little bit. It's good, but it'll be like, there's other people like that, but they worry about judgment too much, so they'll be like, you all that stuff, but they won't show it. Or they won't just it, like. And the moment you do. And even me a bit now, right, I'm like, I don't give a fuck. The weight just comes off.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. Like, no, you don't like everyone. So why do you want everyone to like you?

Paul Cohalan: Like, with that?

Hayli Hooper: Like, people are so busy with their lives.

Paul Cohalan: I didn't ask for your opinion, so.

Hayli Hooper: Who gives a. Yeah. And to have a little bit of balls about yourself. Like, when people try and shut you down, it's because things outside of comfort zone scares people and the unfamiliar scares people. So they're. They're. Australia has the worst Tall Poppy syndrome.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah, it does. It's talked about a bit, actually.

Hayli Hooper: Honestly, like, I want you to succeed.

Paul Cohalan: Succeed. And when you succeed, they try and fuck you over.

Hayli Hooper: Do you know what a very simple analogy of this is?

Paul Cohalan: Yep.

Hayli Hooper: I post a picture in a bikini or a dancing one. It gets maybe 10,000 or 20,000 likes. It gets sent back to me, probably privately, but publicly it would get maybe like, 3 comments and 2 likes. Right. You talk about Instagrams in Brazil. Their Instagrams have one of the best algorithms of girls just in a sexy dress, just dancing. And It'll get like 1 million likes, 1 million comments. Because they think, oh, this. This is a beautiful girl having fun. Like, whereas a show goes, this bitch thinks she's so good. You're a dick. It's the mentality of embracing someone, just being who they are.

Paul Cohalan: Usually it's their insecurities or a competitive thing.

Hayli Hooper: And Australia is so bad for it.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. Yeah. It's like when people comment and stuff. Like, it's like, I feel sorry for you if it's. If you've gotta. If you've gotta, you know, attack and throw stones and all that stuff and not mind your own business. I feel sorry for you because why are you in that fucking spot?

Hayli Hooper: I've never taken time out of my day to go on some strangers instead Instagram and write them a novel about how much I dislike them or what they're doing. How is your life so lacking that you have the time to do that or the kid?

Paul Cohalan: I don't give a. What Hayli's doing tomorrow. I might for about 30 seconds on a snap and go, oh, what are you doing?

Hayli Hooper: Whatever. Yes.

Paul Cohalan: But it's like. I think it was a Gary Vee thing. I shared it the other day, and it's like, it costs zero to be kind. I saw that one and. And I think it was more business. It's like, praise, support. Good on you, Hayli, for doing what you're doing.

Hayli Hooper: Encouragement. Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Y' all would start that concrete business and fuck it up and then try something else. Or win. Or win.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. You gotta fail to learn.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. So three things at the end. I always try, and I've been trying to, like, book in six months to do a check in. Could be overseas.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Where would we do it? And I mean, grab this stuff and go. That's what I'm gonna start doing. Right.

Hayli Hooper: Oh, okay.

Paul Cohalan: Whether it's a store, whether it's whatever the other person's world is environment, the.

Hayli Hooper: It either be the beach or a gym or a hike.

Paul Cohalan: So, yeah, that's. That's wicked. So I'm gonna go down south and do a beach and that as well. So that's wicked. So that's. You like doing stuff. Right. So I'll send you an email after this and it'll have some points in it.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And then we'll talk about that. And the other question is, there's three. The second one is, who do I get on here? This is a compounding network thing as well. Right. This is why it's so good. It's not about a topic.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Who comes to mind? Who could I drag on that would have a good story?

Hayli Hooper: I actually thought about this when you were saying, like, people struggle. There would be. I mean, I'm the worst person for thinking on the spot, but there would be people I would know that would have interesting stories, for sure. I. I think diversification is amazing because you never know who's got a good story. And it doesn't even have to be someone in the spotlight that has a crazy story. Let me think about that and get back to you because I definitely would know people that.

Paul Cohalan: Do you have much of a circle?

Hayli Hooper: Oh, I have a huge circle. Huge. From all different worlds.

Paul Cohalan: The other thing that's happened lately, and I think I mentioned it earlier, which is really fills my cup, is people just reaching out. Like, I want to tell my story. I've had two in, like, five days.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And so I was getting momentum. Right. So if there's anyone that's following this one here and you want to jump on also. Fucking definitely.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah. Yeah, there'd definitely be a lot of.

Paul Cohalan: People because Some people don't. They might not do this, but they really want to tell something or do something. Because everyone's. Everyone's got a wicked book and chapters.

Hayli Hooper: Absolutely. It's even like, case in point, one of my girlfriends, she's a single mother. She put herself through nursing school. She's a parent, paramedic and a nurse. And I won't say her name. She's a bit of a freak. And she's got a very. In a good way. I mean, in a fun way. Yeah. Like, you look at her first, you see the. The mother angle and the wholesome thing. Then you see the caring and the. The tenacious and put herself through school. And then you see the wild side and she's just a normal chick. She's not got Instagram followers. She's not out there where. But like, we. There's so many people out there that have so many layers to them.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. And there's always a story behind it.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: And that's the big piece, you know, I like that.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: Yeah. And third one. What'd you get out of today?

Hayli Hooper: I love podcasts because I like learning about other people and I like to see what they find interesting and where conversation. The world has lost the. You know, it's such a idiosyncrasy. I could never pronounce that word. Whereas we're losing our ability to relate due to social media, yet social media brings out things like this. So on the surface, people are losing the ability to have conversations, yet it is by watching people have conversations. Isn't that ironic? It is like this because it. It brings back a humanity and a relatability to social media and to what we all see and learning people's stories and the polarization of lives where back when we get to ride your bike to your friend's house to see if they're home, now we can see all these things at our fingertips, but it also can highlight good. And stories and motivation if someone gets.

Paul Cohalan: A nugget out of it or relates to it. Because it's authentic.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: That's the whole point. It's. It's wicked.

Hayli Hooper: And men. We covered a lot of dating and stuff.

Paul Cohalan: Here we go.

Hayli Hooper: Like plug again. Well. Oh my God. I was just about to say something. It fully just went out of my head.

Paul Cohalan: But I'm sorry.

Hayli Hooper: The alpha thing and coming in and stuff. All women want these days, when we've got this whole burgeoning generation of women with their own money and with their own time, they want the two things that is priceless. That you can't buy is time and effort. Stop trying to throw money at women and women. Stop trying to take money. Give people conversation, communication, connection, time and effort. Because someone like me, when a guy goes, I don't know where my place is and I don't know what I can give you. All I want is presence. But presence is in person, not material.

Paul Cohalan: That was gold.

Hayli Hooper: I mean, presence is in you being there. No, I'll buy my own presents.

Paul Cohalan: You'll pick something anyway.

Hayli Hooper: But thank you for having me.

Paul Cohalan: No, it's. It's been awesome, Hayli. It's. It's actually. It's been the laugh that I thought it would be. And then who knows what was going to come out.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah, Per. That's the journey.

Paul Cohalan: Enjoy your trip.

Hayli Hooper: No, well, thank you.

Paul Cohalan: It'll be amazing.

Hayli Hooper: Hopefully I don't get human trafficked.

Paul Cohalan: And don't go laying in any foyers naked.

Hayli Hooper: Yeah.

Paul Cohalan: While people having breakfast and not in Albania.

Hayli Hooper: Thanks. Give me up trying to steal stuff. Yeah. Thank you for everything.